darkroom retreat

darkroom retreat
darkroom retreat
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blurb

a complete manual

Hygienic darkroom retreating consists of resting in an absolutely dark room for days, alone, with food. Why do this? To recover psychic balance by taking refuge from the sensory over-stimulation of civilized existence.

This seemingly trivial contrast can lead to a remarkable and lasting restoration of your well-being, making the darkroom a powerful tool.

The book explains why a retreat works, how to do it, and how to make a darkroom, including detailed instructions to attain these effects in your own home.

toward a hygienic psychology

Neither spiritual, therapeutic, nor psychedelic, this is the first approach to darkness—and psychology—based on hygiene. More than mere cleanliness, hygiene remains history’s most influential approach to health. For 180 years, hygiene has taught the modern world appreciation for the self-preserving nature of life and all its normal conditions: fresh air, ample sleep, pure food, frequent bathing and exercise, etc.

Hygiene has long excelled in caring for the self-healing body. With darkness, hygiene now has an equally effective way of caring for the self-healing soul.

This book and more at darkroomretreat.com

preface

This book comes out of a long investigation into the cause of joy.

At 15, great joy spontaneously overcame me. It felt normal. It eclipsed my other concerns. When it disappeared after three heavenly months, I felt gripped by the need to solve its mystery.

After 21 years of investigation, I did. And I discovered the way nature provides us to heal from major trauma, joy’s destroyer. Four years of testing followed, then three more of documentation and refinement.

Briefly, joy is a function of being alive, not effort. Thus lack of joy indicates a damaged system, not moral failure. Given conditions of profound rest, this damage will heal by itself, and joy will return.

Effort, our lifeway’s smug panacea, gives false and fleeting results. With the will, one can do nothing directly to restore joy. One can only support the organism in doing it autonomically.

For 10,000 years, we civilized people have been correct that something is terribly wrong with ourselves and that we must do something about it. But we’ve mistaken which part of ourselves must do it. At long last, this book puts the issue to rest.

foreword

When I first retreated in darkness , I just did it to rest. It worked. After 56 hours, I felt caught up on all the sleep I had ever lost, truly awake for the first time in decades. I was stunned.

Two years later, the same thing happened. Except, unusually, I also felt humbled. Genuinely calm. Well in my soul.

This sense of psychic health stayed with me for months. But how, after a lifetime of depression, alienation, and anxiety?

From hygiene, I vaguely remembered the self-healing nature of life, and rest as the primary condition of healing. The onset of middle age was daily demonstrating the organic nature of the psyche to me. One morning in a dream, these clues fused in a conception of the restful use of darkness in support of the self-healing psyche.

I began testing this idea in more darkroom retreats. As predicted, lethal psychic issues that have tortured me for a lifetime began resolving themselves spontaneously. In eight years and 20 retreats, I have seen no sign of an end to this process—short of full recovery of psychic integrity.

Now I feel confident about what I have learned: what happens in darkness and why; how to retreat and what for. And I can only go further in this by sharing this approach. It needs more participation, resources, and velocity.

Hygienic darkroom retreating requires minimal effort and no faith. Darkness is not a void, but a sanctuary. It is not the absence of light, but the presence of the self. It is yours.

 

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introduction

Imagine:

  • better sleep
  • relief from over-stimulation and distress
  • recovery from fatigue and exhaustion
  • healing from psychic trauma and illness
  • an end to metaphysical suffering itself

How? By a rational method of switching off the world, with its noise and demands, and taking refuge in one’s essential self, allowing it to heal itself by itself. This way is hygienic darkroom retreating: deep psychic rest in total physical darkness. This book is a complete manual for understanding and doing it.

basics

how it works

  1. The psyche, as an organic system, is self-healing.
  2. The primary condition of healing is rest.
  3. Profound psychic rest occurs in extended total darkness as a physiological response

This is fully developed in chapter one, hygiene. Essentially, because the process of healing is automatic, it is foolproof. The psyche needs darkness for rest like lungs need air for breathing and eyes need light for seeing. It knows no substitute. Healing happens involuntarily when conditions of rest are sufficiently provided. This book describes, explains, and shows how to provide them, from abstract theory to concrete practice. This includes designs for darkroom components precise to the millimeter.

terminology

hygiene: hygienism; caring for health by respecting life’s self-preserving nature and providing its normal conditions
Natural Hygiene: the 200 year-old school of health that exemplifies hygiene
normal: what is biologically appropriate (not merely usual or average)
psyche: the faculty of consciousness, including:

  • the unconscious, subconscious, and conscious levels or parts
  • sensation, perception, conception
  • physical, emotional, and intellectual (moving, feeling, and thinking/instinctive, intuitive, intellectual) forms of intelligence

psychic: of or relating to the psyche in general (not occult powers). For example, I refer to psychic illness rather than “mental” illness. Psychology is not just the study of the mind, but the psyche: the entire faculty of human consciousness. This includes emotional and physical aspects not reducible to the mental one.
lifeway: a way of life; everything that happens with people in a given group in the course of living. I once used the word, culture, for this. Then I learned culture is recent: an invention of civilization. I wanted a bigger word which would include all approaches to human existence. Lifeway is a nicely compressed term common in anthropology.

darkroom

A darkroom is a bedroom that is perfectly dark. Sealing a room like this often requires additional ventilation measures. A darkroom can be basic or deluxe. To summarize the practical point of this book, I advocate arranging basic darkness in your bedroom now, deluxe darkness in a remote location later.

Basic darkness means perfectly dark, well-ventilated, reasonably quiet, and comfortable. This provides: darkness for nightly sleep; a place to familiarize yourself with extended darkness at your own pace; and a place for your first short retreats.

Deluxe darkness adds extra features, comforts, and space. A dedicated darkroom is built in a small fully functional house in a quiet location. Like all houses should be but are not, it is perfectly and easily darkened. More about this in the design chapter

background

nature

Darkness is instinctive. We sleep in it at night and nap in shadows. We use our hands to cover our eyes when overwhelmed. We take longer refuge in caves and shelters when injured. We and many other animals always have.

Absolute darkness is natural. Our natural habitat is tropical forest. At night its floor is pitch black.

traditions

Spiritual traditions have used darkness for millennia. They tend to view it as the ultimate environment for self-discipline and gaining unusual knowledge. Egyptians and Maya have used it in pyramids; Christians in catacombs; Sufis and Taoists in caves; Tibetan Buddhists in cells of monasteries.

Indigenous traditions do likewise: Amazonian shamanism uses darkness in ayahuasca ceremony. Welsh shamans and Navajo, Maya, and Kogi Indians alike build special dark structures, holding darkness in high regard as essential to self-discovery.

Western science has studied sensory destimulation since the 1950s for astronautics, health, and mind-control. Ayurveda, India’s ancient healing tradition, uses extended periods of darkness for rejuvenation. By reports, it is nothing less than the fountain of youth.

Unfortunately, the active nature of these approaches to darkroom retreating compromises them. They depend on an active will, the faculty most in need of rest. Hygiene is passive, allowing the distressed will to finally rest and recover. Hygiene primarily depends on the autonomic self—omniscient, omnipotent, and infallible—to accomplish the work of healing. This removes structural conflict in the method, promising limitless results. Hygiene completely secularizes the use of darkness for the specific purpose of healing. There is nothing mystical, disciplined, or complicated about this approach. It is rational, safe, and natural: a reliable miracle.

hygiene

Hygiene is not just cleanliness, as medicine has led us to believe. Hygiene is broad and deep, dealing with all conditions of health. We know the word today because of a radical school of natural health originating in America in 1832 now known as Natural Hygiene. It led the global natural health movement of the 19th century. Hygiene vigorously respects the self-preserving nature of life. It observes that organisms both maintain and recover health under normal conditions of life. So it studies organic self-preservation and how to provide such conditions.

Normal conditions of life include fresh air, sunlight, natural food, and cleanliness by regular bathing. Hygiene taught the modern world their enormous benefits, significantly raising health standards worldwide. Its motto: “Health through healthful living”. It has only lacked a psychology and an appreciation for trauma as the cause of all illness; this book begins to correct that.

Hygiene identifies disease as the process of healing. Disease is the normal organic activity of self-repair, elimination, and re-energizing, but distressed by abnormal conditions. Thus, disease is not an invading entity to be fought. It is a beneficial process to support with healthy conditions and practices and to view as a set of clues to precisely guide this caregiving.

The fundamentals of hygiene help us reconnect with our own common sense about healing. They guide us past incorrect assumptions we likely have about it. Once you have these absolute basics down, you can learn the concrete details of a darkroom retreat and approach it with confidence. Moreover, hygiene provides guidance in all aspects of healthful living.

people

My parents had taught me the importance of eating well through their unconventional researches and experiments. Then Natural Hygiene came knocking three times. Once in 1989 through my dad’s second wife, a truthseeker among whose fascinating books I found the ecstatic Fit for Life by Harvey and Marilyn Diamond. Again in 1992 from a great friend, Sterling Voss. He told me, in the greatest letter anyone ever wrote me, about Fasting Can Save Your Life by Herbert Shelton, hygiene’s systematizer. Finally, in 2001, from close associate, Frederic Patenaude, editor of Just Eat An Apple magazine and author of The Raw Secrets (which I edited and published with him).

frederic

I worked and was housemates with Frederic Patenaude a total of three years off and on from 1998 till 2003. First at Nature’s First Law in California; then Tree of Life in Arizona; then at his new office in Quebec. Frederic had started in hygiene not with Herbert Shelton, but by studying all the works of French hygienic master, Albert Mosseri, with whom he was in contact for many years. Slowly, I absorbed the essence of Natural Hygiene’s radical perspective through Frederic. I mean he got it through my thick skull with his calm, relentless, crystalline arguments. I was challenging but sympathetic, so I kept asking and he kept answering. It took time because I started out quite lost in the mess of alternative dietary ideas floating around my head since childhood. Something finally clicked and I started studying hygiene on my own.

In our many conversations, Frederic mentioned Los Angeles hygienist, Bernarr Zovluck, who advised people to fast with their eyes closed in a curtained room. Later, this comment would help me connect darkness with hygiene.

Frederic’s dedication and great knowledge made him immovable where I was merely stubborn. I can only hope to return the favor with the current work. It illuminates certain mysteries of diet that frustrated us. Like why some people can stick with eating healthy food and others can’t (see hygiene/capacity. And the greater mystery of metaphysical suffering that we, like so many others, failed to solve with diet.

finn

I first heard about darkroom retreating in 2004 from my former guru, Purna Steinitz. An American Hindu, he had heard about its use in Ayurveda. “Apparently, after a few weeks of it, one comes out completely renewed,” he said. I found the idea very strange. A budding hygienist and attracted to spirituality’s Apollonian upper world, I thought we needed light. But like a lot of earthy things Purna said, the idea of renewal in darkness stayed with me.

A year later, I moved to an ecovillage in Oregon. I hit it off with the old village maintenance man, a hippy-from-birth (since his dad was a beatnik). Name of Finn Po. Scrawny guy. Lots of energy. Wizard-level resourcefulness. Full of wry optimistic sayings as well as good-natured quips about people’s hang-ups. Drinks his own pee and lives in a tiny geodesic dome he built out of garbage 20 years ago.

Naturally, Finn also had a darkroom.

“Tired of enlightenment?” he asked. “Try endarkenment.”

I said, “Ohmigod, Finn, really?!”

“It’s the way of the future. Don’t be the last to know.”

“What’s it like?”

Eyes closed, arms wrapped round himself, he said, “It’s a luxury.”

“How do you do it?”

“Ah, just git in the room. I’ll look after you.”

A benevolent Pied Piper and the coolest 60 year-old around, he had inspired all the village’s youth to try it. After listening to him rhapsodize about darkness all winter, I did, too.

Wow.

But as Finn says, I was just getting started. It would take two more years, the massive shock of leaving my guru, and another successful retreat for me to grasp the significance of retreating in darkness.

andrew

How did all this begin?

At age 15, I felt morose and alienated. Slumped in front of the TV one day, one of the tiny people living inside it mentioned the importance of loving oneself and being happy. It was perfect timing. If my mood was like the Death Star, this banal advice was like Luke Skywalker’s photon torpedo.

In a moment, I was spontaneously overcome by rapture: sublime joy in perceiving and being part of a perfect, beautiful universe. This feeling and perspective lasted three months solid. When they faded, so did my previous interests. I wanted more than anything to understand the cause of rapture—in order to recover it. Living out of a backpack, I independently investigated this mystery for 21 years, experimenting with philosophy, health, and design. Toward the end of this period, I did my first darkroom retreats. Soon after, in late 2008, the answer came:

A slight increase of vital energy from adolescence had caused a temporary, partial restoration of my damaged psychic integrity, revealing an enrapturing universe. So a massive increase from profound rest in darkness would cause permanent and complete restoration.

With this breakthrough, my search ended and my work began. I and 25 clients have tried it. Their results echoed my early ones. Over the course of my 20 retreats of 2–7 days, noticeable restoration of my psychic integrity and function has occurred. My body’s scent has improved. I do not grind my teeth nearly as much. I regained some access to my long-buried sexuality. From one retreat, I woke up feeling like an adult for the first time in 41 years; this feeling has not changed. In retreat, symptoms of fibro-myalgia dissipate. Flexibility returns. I wake up just knowing things that had mystified me, feeling resolution to issues that had frustrated me for decades. Insomnia, exhaustion, and suicidal thoughts and feelings evaporate. Clarity, energy, relaxedness, even joy return for weeks at a time. Basic functioning lasts two months. All these came to me after going years at a time without them.

Besides this supporting evidence, no data contradicting the basic idea has yet emerged. Interest in darkness is growing worldwide. An internationally recognized psychology professor with decades of experience as a flotation researcher unqualifiedly agrees with my theory and wants to do research with my exact method. Wherever I go, people are as struck as I am by the simple logic of this idea and want to try a retreat.

As Finn says, what else can go right?

application

audience

This book is for:

  • those who suffer in any way—spiritually, mentally, emotionally, physically, socially, ecologically—and who need hope that their suffering is impermanent
  • self-experimenters and those who wish to know themselves
  • appreciators of good arguments

Darkroom retreating is for anyone to whom it makes sense and who feels moved to do it, whether to heal from acute illness or to simply see what it’s like. Besides psychic illness, much physical illness is psychosomatic and therefore amenable to self-healing in darkness.

However, darkness is no escape. Sometimes illness needs to be addressed in other obvious ways first. But just knowing about darkroom retreating can be greatly encouraging. Acquaintance with hygienic principles is invaluable in healing from any illness.

how to use this book

Above all, this book presents an idea for consideration. For now, applying it is not at issue. You can only do something like this if you want to. And you can only want to if you know enough about it. So take your time absorbing the idea. Natural motivation comes from rational belief, which comes from knowledge. Thus, first invest your time in knowledge by reading every word, cover to cover. As Finn says, “Nothing costs more than what you don’t pay for.”

Once you are motivated, use the book as a manual for making basic darkness for yourself at your own place. Download the companion zip file to get all the plans for components as well as some reference reading.

Help from others may or may not come. You are the one you have been waiting for. The need for self-reliance applies to darkness more than anything else I’ve ever gotten involved with. It has been hard for me to recover enough of a self to rely on, to ferret out remnants of it I didn’t know I had. But bit by bit, “a little here, a little there”, the task is being accomplished.

The full application of the idea of hygienic darkroom retreating consists of doing retreats of increasing length alternated with periods of making the radical changes in lifeway you are now capable of. This includes studying and applying the rest of hygiene. Continue until your psychic integrity and physical health are completely restored. Live.

contents

Chapters are mostly practical with a dose of theory to start with.

  1. hygiene: the theory underlying the restful use of darkness
  2. format: ways to use darkness in retreats and daily life
  3. protocol: what little there is to do in a hygienic darkroom retreat
  4. prepare: orientation
  5. design: darkroom specifications
  6. make: instructions and plans for making a darkroom
  7. faq: frequently asked questions

Content is drawn from my website, darkroom retreat, at andrewdurham.com. There, you can also read: a series of my retreat reports; theoretical essays linked to in this booklet; elaborative blog posts; related myths; and essays, designs, prose, poetry, and lyrics from the past 25 years.

open-source psychology

Thanks for reading. Please copy and give out this free book as much as you please. See the license for more about how we both can directly benefit from this.

Besides being free content, this is an open source project contained in a public code repository. Fork the project, open an issue, or submit a pull request. Learn distributed version control software. Or just write me directly with comments and corrections.

If you find a theoretical or practical error in the approach or a way to improve it, please let me know. I am happy to change these instructions if your proposal

  • presents a rational argument
  • remains consonant with hygienic principles
  • includes clear reports of your own reproducible experiments with the current method

Likewise, I am open to working with you in any way to develop hygienic darkroom retreating and advance its cause as long as you:

  • have read my book
  • demonstrates understanding of its basic ideas
  • have done a retreat according to my protocol and are convinced of its value

I continually update this book. This edition refocuses the book on making a darkroom at home first. It contains new designs for the lightproof vent and window coverings. So especially before building, download the latest version of the book and review relevant sections.

help

Join the dolphin economy: I help you help me help you help me help you…

In addition to this book, I can assist you by email, skype, and in person. See about>services for details.

You can contribute by:

  • writing me with a friendly question or comment
  • darkening your room and retreating according to this method
  • reporting your experience online with photos and sending me the link
  • improving the method and designs
  • improving the website
  • donating money to me on my homepage; I live extremely simply, so even small amounts help
  • lending or helping me rent a suitable retreat location for a month so I can heal from my own psychosis, characterized by exhaustion-depression and various physical ailments
  • doing something not listed above, perhaps something only you know about or that we can develop together

Thanks for reading and best wishes.

Now on to the basics of the life-restoring perspective of hygiene.

1 - hygiene

Hygiene is a complete system of health and healing based on the self-preserving nature of life and an appreciation for its normal conditions. More than mere cleanliness, hygiene is a 200 year-old, globally established health care system. We hardly discuss it because it’s just how things are done. Little known in its fullness, its depth and details strike newcomers as oddly familiar.

Hygiene provides a comprehensive context for the restful use of darkness in support of the self-healing psyche. Hygiene enables us to understand what darkness is and how to relate to it for the purpose of health.

Which is the point. We are organisms, so our purpose is to live. To live fully, we need health.

What is health like according to hygiene?

“Health does not consist merely of the absence of symptoms of illness. It is a state of positive well-being that is evidenced by a constant state of euphoria. It is rarely, if ever, experienced by humans today.”
–Herbert Shelton, father of modern hygiene1

Euphoria is exactly the sign of long-lost function that my adolescent rapture hinted at. Once tasted, nothing else will do. The thing is to come by it on purpose, not just by chance. What conditions would make it possible? Identifying and providing conditions is hygiene’s forte. It accomplishes this by making ordinary observations of life in nature along certain lines.

So we will learn these lines in the first section, which relates the basics of hygiene. The next section makes natural observations of the psyche and darkness, shows how hygiene applies to them, and fully reveals the secret of exactly how darkroom retreating works. Afterward, some distinctions between hygiene and other approaches further aid understanding. Then I introduce the logistics of retreating before heading into its depths, the uncharted territory of hygienic psychology.

hygiene

essence

Here is Webster’s basic definition:

hygiene: conditions and practices conducive to the preservation of health

In common usage, hygiene means vigilant cleanliness against germs and use of safety equipment to protect against a hostile environment. But hygiene includes all healthy conditions and practices. It is fearless, relaxed, and respectful of life’s resilience.

Natural Hygiene makes all this explicit. It identifies “preservation” with life’s defining characteristic of self-preservation. And it identifies “conditions and practices conducive” to health with the normal conditions of life. Thus it recognizes the self-preserving organism and seeks to provide it with normal conditions of life in both sickness and health. This originates in hygiene’s observation of ubiquitous health in nature, where organisms also get injured and sick, yet only normal conditions of life exist. For humans, these conditions and practices, both physiological and social, include:

  • air, warmth, water, food, sunlight & darkness, habitat
  • sleep and rest, poise, exercise, cleanliness, work
  • family & friends, freedom, peace, prosperity
  • camaraderie, affection, sex, love

The extent and organization of this list is somewhat arbitrary. It simply helps ground our discussion in biology, including psycho- and sociobiology.

history

Hygiene originated in America a generation after the Revolution, in the Age of Enlightenment. With the lectures of Sylvester Graham, physiologist and namesake of Graham flour, hygiene became a mass movement in 1832. Two doctors, Isaac Jennings and Russell Trall, abandoned drugging, further developed hygienic theory and practice, and spread hygiene widely with publications, teaching, and organization. Mary Gove helped bring hygiene to women of the 19th century, whose increasing independence it matched. Florence Nightingale transmitted its rudiments internationally through nursing (before medicine co-opted nursing). Herbert Shelton revived and systematized it for the 20th century. He formalized it as “Natural Hygiene” to strike the imagination and distinguish it from narrow common usage.

Medicine, funded through Rockefeller’s pharmaceutical interests, opposed hygiene while taking credit for the huge improvements to public health it led to. Medicine made war on hygiene’s exponents, institutions, and full teachings through propaganda and lobbying. It covered its tracks by reducing hygiene to the idea of cleanliness. Thus few know the real story.

Nonetheless, hygiene remains the most effective and influential approach to health and healing in world history. It now benefits nearly every person on the planet. With the advent of a hygienic psychology and the astounding power of the organism in darkness, hygiene’s influence will increase exponentially. So I am leaving behind the special name, Natural Hygiene, to reclaim the word, hygiene, for our tradition.

laws

Shelton describes hygiene as “the employment of materials, agents, and influences that have a normal relationship to life, in the preservation and restoration of health according to well-defined laws and demonstrated principles of nature.”2 These laws are the absolute heart of hygiene and thus a great key to understanding it. Please read them in the appendices when you finish this section.

Natural Hygiene is based on the fact, identity, and causality of life: that life is, that life is alive, that life lives. Ie, it is inherently self-preserving. This is the first part of hygiene’s Great Law of Life. Self-preserving means self-generating, self-maintaining, and self-healing. This is true in every respect and at every scale, from the cells to the organism as a whole. This is part of the Law of Order.

The Great Law implies other laws. The Law of Action states that only the organism performs vital action, including healing. So only the organism can heal the organism and, again, at every scale: even a cell must heal itself; another cannot. The Law of Power states that energy employed to perform action resides only in the organism, not anything external to it.

Thus, no drug, herb, or food; no condition or practice; no treatment, person, or device heals. Thus there are no cures. Attempting to heal the body from the outside further damages or drains its power to heal itself, masking its untouched illness and delaying its healing, whatever benefit might appear in the short term. This is an example of the intriguing Law of Dual Effect. Other Laws compliment these. Take a moment now to read hygiene’s 16 Laws of Life in the appendices.

examples

Whether well or ill, one’s conscious (volitional) role is to discover and provide the normal conditions of life in the proper proportion. The autonomic processes of the omniscient, omnipotent, infallible organism handle the rest. Hygiene systematically describes how this happens with these and other logically interrelated laws. All are derived from simple observations everyone can make. It is a science of everyone, ripe for self-experimentation.

A drug, for example, is a poison by definition. This is why drugs are legally controlled. An organism does not relate with poison but rapidly neutralizes and expels it. By contrast, an organism assimilates food into its own structure.

Fasting when ill is an instinctive extension of time between meals. In this break, the body can rest from most metabolic processes, repair tissues, eliminate deeply stored toxins and waste, and replenish itself with nutrients and energy to the farthest reaches of every cell. So fasting is a part of Natural Hygiene. As fasting enables physiological rest, darkroom retreating enables profound psychic rest.

One of hygiene’s most striking insights regards disease. In disease the symptoms we observe do not afflict the body, but are precisely how the body is healing itself and signaling for care. Pain signifies damage, uncleanliness, mechanical repair and neutralization of toxins. Infection and inflammation after first aid signify neutralization and elimination of internal toxins. Unpleasant discharges—vomiting, diarrhea, extra sweating, rashes, bad breath, dark urine—are the elimination of gross accumulated toxins and waste through every organ. Loss of appetite conserves the immense effort of digestion. Weakness and exhaustion enable all vital force to be used for healing. Every one of these is a biological virtue. None should be feared or suppressed. All should be viewed as vital victories, trusted, observed, supported, and waited out. All occur in the most efficient possible way for the purpose of restoring health.

In the relationship between food and nerve energy lies another example of vital relations. Food does not actually give energy to the body directly. Food takes nerve, chemical, and muscular energy to eat and digest. Otherwise we could just eat to restore our strength. Food provides sugar, which refuels everything from large muscle movement to thinking to cell operation. Some of this refueling can occur within seconds of eating easily digested food like fruit. But the body only transforms sugar into reserve electrical potential of the nerves during sleep. It only eliminates toxins from tissues and repairs them completely while they are unused.

So again we see that no external force has power to act for life, only life itself. Life is the doer. Hygiene helps us redirect to the autonomic self the vast attention paid in our lifeway to the volitional self. Volition plays a critical yet small part in the whole process of life. Now, hygiene can offer darkness as a means of caring for the autonomic self in its primary system.

The deep self will not solve all one’s problems in darkroom retreat. But it will have the chance to recover lost capacity. Recapacitated, one can then make the radical changes in lifeway necessary to handle one’s remaining problems. See protocol/post-retreat for more about this.

capacity

I have mentioned capacity a few times. It is so important an idea, I have formulated a new hygienic law about it.

Law of Vital Capacity: Capacity determines function. Capacity is the degree of an organism’s structural integrity. Function is one’s level of physical, emotional, and mental ability to live. How one is limits what one can do—and benefit from.

Structure is the psychophysical framework of life, holding an organism up, keeping it together. Like life, capacity is a union of being and consciousness, the vital pattern of an organism at every scale. It is lifeforce in a particular form. Yet it cannot be reduced, for example, to consciousness, the nervous system, the skeleton or myofascia, or DNA. Any of these can most clearly represent its presence or absence at any given time. Capacity is synonymous with constitution, endowment, type, inheritance, stock, and potential. Like these, capacity is conventionally assumed to be static; in fact it is dynamic, changing constantly.

Two influences affect capacity significantly: profound rest (positively) and major trauma (negatively). Profound rest, like the organism itself, is physical and psychical. Fasting provides primarily physical rest; darkroom retreating, primarily psychic rest. These can be used together or separately depending on capacity. Capacity is experienced as a sense of ease in doing something.

Contrary to common opinion, normal daily conditions of lifestyle affect capacity insignificantly. Thus, so do effort, will, and discipline. Whatever gains one makes by them beyond one’s capacity are minor, however impressive they may seem, and are easily lost.

Likewise, heroic discipline and supereffort (doing something twice as much or twice as fast) have the notable but still insignificant negative effect of making people seem like weird assholes. Common examples include people who are religious about god, politics, food. Fortunately, this condition abates with enough rest.

The benefit one derives from normal conditions and efforts cannot exceed one’s capacity for it. When capacity is damaged (as with virtually all humans now), the unconscious self prevents further damage from increased energy of normal levels of pleasure, joy, fulfillment, and success. We often call the results of this life-saving mechanism “self-sabotage” or “bad habits”. But we can best understand it as a symptom of disease. Thus, as hygienists, we seek to understand and support it, not fight it.

Imagine a damaged electrical device. Simply running a regular amount of power through it won’t repair it, and may well cause further damage to circuitry. It is best to immediately stop it, turn it off, unplug it, and bring it to a workshop for repair.

Likewise, one’s capacity for ordinary rest determines how much of it one will enjoy. A good night’s sleep begins a deep healing process that may take days or weeks to complete. A good night’s sleep entails stillness and leads to re-energization and clarity. These tend to irritate damaged capacity. It’s like rebreaking a badly set bone. It is acceptable if the new energy will fuel complete repair. But if light and activity will interrupt the process in the morning, then, from the comprehensive perspective of capacity, it’s best to not start at all.

If, due to a lack of time, safety, or understanding we have not met all the conditions of healing, then unconsciously, we will be prevented from sleeping until we can really sleep. Insomnia typically results. As with the rest of functioning, only in profound rest does the organism restore its capacity for ordinary rest.

This analysis applies to everything we try that repeatedly fails and frustrates us.

Like staying on a good diet. One starts eating well. Congestion clears. Sleep becomes easy and delicious. Clarity, motivation, and joy return. Eventually, the energy level reaches an fever pitch and something snaps. With the indifference of an executioner, one inhales three pieces of stale cake that, just a few days before, was obviously horrifying.

The unbearable level of energy in real emotion has the same effect on many of us. Or in meeting a magnificent personality. Or in getting a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity. Choke artistry springs from nowhere: where’s the ice cream? It’s time for an all-night movie marathon! To prevent further damage to capacity, the autonomic self does whatever it takes.

Thus, we can see how moralizing about choices, habits, commitment, etc, is ineffective because it is irrelevant. We are not creatures of habit. We are creatures of capacity. In any given moment, we do absolutely the best we possibly can. Every thought, every feeling, every action is an utmost expression of one’s capacity. The instant capacity rises or falls, so does function. Life cannot do otherwise.

Genuine benefits gained by normal efforts simply realize one’s capacity. That’s why they feel fun. When emergencies or unusual opportunities call for extra effort, the body supplies adrenaline for it. But we err in continuing to exert extra effort over a prolonged time span for any purpose, let alone the mind-boggling task of restoring original human capacity. The will fails to achieve it. Only the involuntary power that gave us life in the first place can. This power cannot be manipulated, only provided for.

Like Life’s Great Law, the Law of Vital Capacity integrates several existing hygienic Laws of Life. It casts them in a different light. It contains elements of the Laws of Compensation, Distribution, the Minimum, and others. It has many implications. If, like me, it takes over your perspective, you may realize some of your usual efforts are futile. You may feel your attention freed to focus on what you can actually accomplish.

false capacity

What one can actually accomplish may change in strange and unnerving ways from retreating.

This results from the destruction of false capacity as the organism restores normal capacity. False capacity results from the extra effort of practice and discipline one makes to compensate for damaged original capacity. False capacity is fragile, hard to maintain, inflexible, incomplete, and inefficient. So the organism gets rid of it as soon as possible.

With false capacity go the survival tricks it sustained. The ego is concerned with survival tricks. The organism is concerned with overall function and efficiency. Normal capacity is generalized and adapts to a variety of situations. This definitely take some getting used to!

With every new breakthrough I had, either psychophysically or just mentally, I would experience a corresponding loss of function. It confused, even scared me for years. Abilities I counted upon, that I always had, suddenly disappeared. The process can seem like it’s backfiring or going wrong. In fact, it is critical to healing. The organism quietly readjusts to normal capacity. Everything is under control.

This idea contradicts our moralized perspective. How surprised everyone will be to find that the years they spent working so hard on their character cannot compare with the results of doing nothing for a few weeks in darkness. That our efforts make us fake and our pride keeps us stuck.

integration of laws

Hygiene has 16 laws. But 16 of anything is too great a number for the mind to apprehend at once. So over time, other integrations will emerge or some laws will be recognized as primary to others. Three to five “Great Laws”, with the others as corollaries or sub-laws, will bring hygiene within reach of everyone’s understanding.

darkroom retreating

psyche

“Graham pointed out that the ‘vital instincts’ behaved as though directed by intelligence. Tilden held that physiology is ‘organized psychology.’”3 And here is Shelton’s unsentimental view of the psyche: “The conscious functions of the body serve primarily to protect and provide the needs of the subconscious functions.”4 This means consciousness is not an end in itself. It serves a biological function. Hygiene views consciousness as primarily autonomic (subconscious), secondarily volitional (conscious).

Furthermore, the psyche is the primary system in the human organism5. The psyche coordinates all other systems. It does so consciously, as when reading this book or running an errand; subconsciously, as when performing automatized processes which can be made conscious, like cognizing words or walking; and unconsciously, as when performing autonomic processes which cannot be made conscious, like regulating cell division or blood oxygen levels. The psyche is diffuse throughout the organism, functioning at every scale, autonomically monitoring and harmonizing every one of 5 pentillion (5,000,000,000,000,000,000) organic processes per second. Whatever affects the psyche for good or ill greatly affects the rest of the organism likewise.

That’s a lot of work. Like any other organic system, the psyche needs a period of rest and recovery. Since its sensory apparatus is reflexive—the skin automatically feels what makes contact with it, the nose smells, the eyes see—sensory destimulation is necessary for psychic rest. Think back to the times you got your best sleep. Besides feeling at ease, your shelter was probably especially dark, well-ventilated, and quiet. While the exact circumstances at the time cannot be replicated, these critical elements can be.

darkness

Human beings are diurnal creatures, naturally awake in daytime and asleep at night. This physiological cycle is critical to psychic function. Modern life replaces the natural extremes of sun and stars with the relentless grey of artificial light and sunglasses. It replaces natural sleeping patterns with graveyard shifts and afterparties. This greyness, along with a hundred other civilized offences, has pushed psychic illness to epidemic proportions. Simply put, our lifeway is brutal, traumatic, damaging, and dysfunctional.

Modern distress (sensory overload, overwork, loneliness, factory food, etc) requires hundreds of millions of people to consume psychoactive drugs just to function minimally. Most dislike this dependency, which causes further distress. Caught in a vicious circle, they wonder helplessly how things will ever change.

While many factors contribute to distress, hygienic darkroom retreating uniquely provides an opening: a simple way to begin reversing all of them at once. First, it harmlessly brings them to a halt. Second, it provides the being a chance to recover from them naturally, that is, by itself. Autonomically. No drugs, no therapy, no experts. Self-healing unleashed.

Thus, contrary to fairy tales, religion, and light bulb advertisements, darkness is a good thing. Darkness, like light, is a natural condition of life. We need nature’s full provision of it—10 hours a day—in order to rest properly. In crisis, we need an extended period of darkness to recover. Darkroom retreating is to the psyche what fasting is to the body:

  • relief from sensory processing
  • time to fully recover from injury, intoxication, and exhaustion
  • overdue recognition of exactly which part of whom is performing the recovery

Instinct in extreme circumstances gives us a graphic clue to the basic need for darkness: when psychically overwhelmed, a person crouches down and covers her eyes, taking cover in solitude if possible. Depressed, hysterical, or shocked from violence, her whole being cries out, “Gimme shelter!”.

A darkroom is that shelter. And now that we have found shelter—a context—for darkness itself, we can better understand why darkroom retreating works.

hygiene revisited

Let’s analyze hygiene’s definition: conditions and practices conducive to the preservation of health.

  • “conditions and practices” are the normal conditions of life, the environmental and instinctive factors nature has always provided that make life, including healing, possible
  • Conducive means:
    • making it easy, possible, or likely for something to happen or exist
    • tending to promote or assist
    • contributive to
  • Preservation refers an organism’s preservation of itself
  • Health refers to that of an organism

Thus, normal conditions support the organism in preserving its own health. Hygiene means self-preservation through providing oneself the normal conditions of life. This whole meaning hides in the dictionary’s definition. Natural Hygiene, as the standard bearer of the whole tradition of hygiene, makes it explicit.

Now we can elaborate on self-preservation, which:

  • is the defining characteristic of all organisms
  • occurs at every scale: cells, organs, systems, and the organism as a whole
  • is comprised of self-generation, self-maintenance, and self-healing

Self-healing:

  • requires more work, time, and energy than self-maintenance, but less than self-generation
  • includes:
    • repair of damage
    • elimination of toxins, exogenous and endogenous
    • re-energization of tissue

Consciously, we provide the conditions of life. Unconsciously, we use them in life’s staggering number and variety of processes of self-preservation.

The unconscious is:

  • the hidden part of consciousness. It is pervasive in the being, an integral aspect of every cell, organ, system, and the organism as a whole
  • the biggest part of consciousness, coordinating millions of actions per second in each one of the 10 trillion cells
  • omniscient, omnipotent, and infallible: all-knowing, all-powerful, and incapable of error
  • just waiting for a chance to fix what is broken

Hygienic darkroom retreating is that chance.

secret

At last we are prepared to understand the secret of why hygienic darkroom retreating works. There are five reasons.

  1. Rest is a physiological certainty in perfect darkness. Darkness signals the circadian system, which governs our daily biological rhythms, to cause sleep. The circadian system is controlled by the suprachiasmatic nucleus. This tiny organ rests atop the intersection of the optic nerves coming from the eyes. It detects the presence or absence light instantly and independently from the visual cortex in the brain.

    In darkness, it gives one of its most important instructions to the pineal gland: to secrete melatonin into the blood. Melatonin, a hormone, causes us to sleep, dream, and lose appetite. In absolute darkness, the pineal gland floods the body with melatonin, intensifying these restful processes.

    Melatonin is but one of hundreds of hormones, nervous signals, and processes that facilitate the rest and sleep necessary to recover from and assimilate the benefits of the work of waking life.

  2. The abstract mind calms down without the abstract visual data that feeds it
    • less thought occurs
    • thinking becomes harder and less interesting
    • directing attention restfully becomes much easier.
  3. We conserve the significant effort and energy of sensory processing. Sight requires twice as much processing as all other senses combined. Darkness eliminates vision and minimizes other sensation.

    What sensation remains tends to feed feeling. The sense of internal touch sharpens. These are the bases of intuition and instinct, aspects of consciousness suppressed in civilization. Reactivated, they balance the psychic workload, making it more efficient.

  4. A retreat doesn’t just provide absolute darkness, but all conditions of profound rest:
    • safety, comfort, silence, solitude, and time
    • fresh air, warmth, and natural food
  5. Hygiene’s passive attitude toward healing enables the internal peace and cooperation between the conscious and unconsious parts of the self that is necessary for full healing to occur.

In terms of experiencing profound rest and the miraculous healing that inevitably results, a hygienic darkroom retreat is a perfect storm.

distinctions

Not all darkroom retreats are created equal. For eons all over the world, people of every ancient spiritual and cultural tradition have been quietly retreating in darkness. But subtle differences with profound effects exist between most of their approaches and the hygienic one. In this section, I explain the difference in the hygienic approach and its importance in using darkness on your own.

attitude

Civilization has taught us well: in various ways, we have all come to think that somehow, someday, we would finally do something about our quandary. We feel pumped up by the prospect of doing something consciously and directly. We enthusiastically sign up for workshops, submit to treatments, undertake disciplines, and experiment with exotic psychoactive substances. Meanwhile, the all-knowing autonomic self rots in an unemployment line.

Regrettably, no pleasant way exists to put it: this is pure egomania. It is an act. It is a pretence of enthusiasm and competence to cover up painful psychic damage, self-loss, helplessness, and the urge to total selflessness by suicide. Under regular circumstances, we won’t drop this act. We cannot. It would be too painful and frightening. We need a really safe place in which to do it. Nature provides it in darkness.

Even if we were not utterly helpless in our post-traumatic amnesia and denial, hygiene shows that we cannot willfully heal injury anyway. This may seem discouraging. But it is fruitful, for it can elicit a strong enough response from conscience to halt our futile efforts, notice the all-powerful self-healing organism, and finally provide for it.

Pathologically disidentified from life, we are powerless. We stumble infirmly yet presume to control the grand order of life rather than serve it. It is time to face facts. We are not going to handle our quandary. As we imagine ourselves to be—just the conscious, volitional part of ourselves—we are not going to get it done or have anything to do with its getting done. We are not going to figure it out. We are fit to be tied.

The best we can do is fully admit our helplessness and surrender to the only force that could ever untie the knot. It is the Gordian Knot. But the knot must be untied, the precious rope put to use again. Alexander did not properly handle it by cutting it open with his sword, and neither will we with our scheming, effort, or skill. Only the silent, slow tendrils of the autonomic organism’s vast intelligence can ever untie such a tangle. But it needs our recognition, our commission to do the job. We must consciously support the unconscious. Integrity is the end, so integrity must be the means as well.

Hygiene’s passive emphasis on rest and healing is very important because it defines the appropriate attitude toward retreating. I learned in fasting that how one approaches a retreat has a great effect on what happens in it. The mind becomes extremely powerful when it is resting and purifying. If one’s attitude is really to passively support the omnipotent healing forces of the organism in doing everything, the effect of this internal unity will be much greater than if one has the conflicted doer-attitude of a practitioner.

I know no one who has explicitly gone into darkness with the hygienic perspective, with the sole purpose of simply providing the conditions of life to the self-healing organism. Since the organism is the only thing that heals the organism, this is far more powerful than any other approach can be. While stories of miraculous healing in darkness continue to find their way to me, I suspect they will pale in comparison to what the hygienic perspective will make possible. Attitude affects recovery.

The main effort involved is supportive: to maintain the conditions of healing. This ain’t a tall order. Stay in the darkroom. Lie down as much as possible. Eat. Exercise. Bathe. Eliminate. Meditate if so moved. Lie back down. Think when necessary. Stare at the backs of your eyelids, feel your breath and pulse, and let sleep come.

It will anyway. Darkness ensures it. An animal whose bloodstream flooded with melatonin is compelled to sleep. And sleep deeply. In my retreats, I have often felt positively knocked out. Dreams are fewer or more vivid. In 48 hours it is possible to catch up on all the sleep one has ever lost.* I am not speaking metaphorically. It is impossible to believe until it happens.

I find if there is the least bit of light, I am too distracted, too stimulated. I am on guard. I can’t relax. I can’t stay with what I’m feeling. I can’t “just be with it”. I can’t feel into myself. I’ve tried and failed my whole life. I have found solace only in darkness.

To me, it feels like falling through a trapdoor. At the end of my second successful retreat, I felt five or six more such trapdoors awaited me, which would take a total of about two weeks of darkness to fall through. Then I would see the other side of my personal struggle, my lifelong dilemma. I still await my chance.

There were times I felt I was crawling in my skin. So the whole thing was alternately very pleasant and very unpleasant. But it is no worse than what I go through anyway. It is just accelerated, concentrated, and without distraction. And there is a good chance of never reliving the horror again.

fulfilment

A very pleasant effect of this restful attitude becomes more apparent the longer a retreat goes on: a sense of fulfilment. It is as if all one’s futile efforts of the past are redeemed and their goal is finally realized. As lost parts of the self are recovered, the satisfaction of simply being alive returns.

When exhausted, just getting up to pee can feel like a chore. In darkness, this feeling of imposition can intensify at first. But then, imperceptibly, it turns to satisfaction again. For me, for example, to exercise became fun after three days. I felt how frustrated I had been in my inactivity.

Frustration is one of many effects of psychic damage. Damage incapacitates us. We can no longer do certain normal things. The organism generates fear of the activity to prevent us from trying, failing, and hurting ourselves even worse.

But we still desire these activities. Frustration is the conflict between desire and fear. The organism thus expends a tremendous amount of energy to keep us safe in our incapacity. Recapacitation removes the cause of fear, enables fulfilment of desire, and releases vital energy for other tasks. Self-recovery accelerates and deepens.

not

There are three things the hygienic use of darkness is not.

  1. It is not the discipline of meditation. Discipline is consistent exercise of the will. Will is the most delicate, energy-consuming, and, due to atrophy, ineffective part of the psyche. The psyche is the system most in need of rest. So discipline sets into motion and takes energy from the healing of the faculties it depends on while giving the least possible benefit for time, energy, and effort expended. Granted, it produces results impressive by the tragically low standard of ordinary people. But it prevents accomplishment of the top priority: full recovery of the psyche from its catastrophic damage.

    Spiritual meditation, like all spiritual practice, entails supereffort to force access to subtle energy reserves to fuel transformation. The hygienic approach entails exactly the opposite: profound rest to conserve movement and energy for self-restoration. The conscious self attempts nothing to ameliorate suffering. It only provides conditions of healing to the unconscious, autonomic self, whose job is to heal the organism.

    Discipline begins with accepting as real, as natural, the appearance of an intrinsic internal conflict: original sin. Next, one struggles “against nature”, fighting habits with practices to achieve an ideal. Hygiene begins with an assumption of natural harmony, of non-contradiction and a logical explanation of illness. This naturally motivates one to easily fulfill its aim, which is healthy in reality.

    Lastly, discipline sets up artificial dangers and obstacles by partially retaining willed control of the process. Then it spreads fear about retreating without the necessary preparations guided by experts of the tradition. It’s a self-fulfilling delusion if not an outright racket.

  2. It is not therapy. Therapy is done to a passive organism from the outside. The therapist, therapy, and therapeutic substances are the principal actors in a therapeutic session, not the organism itself. While depending on the organism to react to treatment, therapy views the organism as incapable of initiating a movement toward health. It fails to see such movement in disease itself.

    In a darkroom retreat, darkness does nothing. Like air or water, it merely presents an opportunity to the self-preserving organism to better pursue its ceaseless tendency toward wholeness. The principal actor is life, not its conditions nor any treatment.

  3. It is not a psychedelic trip: consciously experiencing normally unconscious phenomena using abnormal conditions like sleep-deprivation or chemicals, natural or artificial.

These three approaches all share the vain attempt to end suffering by subjecting the unconscious to conscious action, as if mere attention, analysis, or reconditioning could fix the unconscious. They try to willfully improve what they regard as an inert, even resistant unconscious self, as if it were incapable or disinclined of doing so itself. Unfortunately, this attitude is ignorantly coercive toward the injured conscious self and discouraging to the omnipotent autonomic self. It is internalized tyranny predictably accompanied by triune brain-drain.

In contrast, hygienic use of darkness is passive as regards the will. The conscious self only plays a supportive role. The unconscious autonomic self is the principal actor. Zero conflict. Maximum efficiency. Perfect result.

One way or another, successful retreating requires cooperation with a supreme intelligence and power that will direct the process. In spiritual traditions, this means one’s mature spiritual practice combined with the in-person guidance of a realized master under the blessed influence of an authentic lineage in service to god. (And good luck arranging all that.) Fortunately, the essence of all that is actually the simple recognition of the autonomic self. This is the hygienic approach. It involves no gold-leafed statues or exotic rituals, but it has the virtue of being cheap, quick, and easy to remember when the lights go out and you can’t read anymore.

mechanics

food

Attention to diet and nutrition have always been part of Natural Hygiene. Due to decreased activity, stress, and appetite, darkness presents a miraculous opportunity to:

  • eat well
  • interrupt the malnourishing, dissociative, toxifying relationship with food from which most of us suffer
  • clearly experience one’s thoughts, feelings and sensations

This is why I serve and recommend only fresh fruit and greens to retreatants. This is the frugivorous diet, common to all anthropoid primates like us. Being perfectly appropriate for human anatomy and physiology, these foods only nourish us. They neither stimulate or intoxify the system, nor overtax digestion, nor suppress feeling or memory.

For more about frugivorous diet, I recommend The 80/10/10 Diet by Dr Douglas Graham. He is a Natural Hygienist, 25-year frugivore, and Olympic trainer. Also, the videos of Loren Lockman, also a master hygienist and 25-year frugivore, apparently sent from the future to show us how to eat and relate to food.

However, if the prospect of eating just fruits and vegetables utterly stops you from retreating, then plan to eat as simply and naturally as you know how. Feel free to write me with your limitations; I am happy to help you avoid toxins often regarded as healthy. Reversing illness and suffering is a process with its own logic. Darkness is a starting point. Then it’s one step at a time.

Note: just because the frugivorous diet consists of all raw food does not make it “the raw food diet”. Frugivorism has a rich set of criteria about food (timing, quantity, proportion, combination, season, source, one’s feeling, etc). Raw foodism only has one criterion: no high-heating of food. Otherwise, anything goes! So it lacks depth and seriousness. It is fanaticism, not a whole relationship with food. I strongly recommend against it and the quasi-cults that grow up around it.

preparation

Since one can do nothing directly in a retreat to cause healing, preparing for it consists of providing its simple conditions:

  • design and make a darkroom (1-30 days)
  • learn the idea of the hygienic (passive) attitude toward healing (already done). Belief can come later.
  • avoid reinventing the wheel by finishing the rest of this book
  • learn enough about eating frugivorously to feel satisfied (1 month to read and apply Graham’s book)
  • schedule a retreat, arrange support, and obtain food

Deeper preparation than that is made the same way you prepare for weeks in traction in a hospital bed following a disastrous car crash. Ie, it is too late. You are already prepared.

depths

Lacking a psychology, hygiene could not penetrate certain depths of human experience nor treat certain subjects. That changes now. From now on, hygiene is a complete system of health capable of perfectly addressing every illness people face, with none of the costs and failures of medicine and other systems essentially rooted in the doctrine of original sin and the practice of exorcism.

trauma

In the course of days alone in a darkroom, it is inevitable that unresolved psychic trouble from one’s past will come to the surface. Buried thoughts, feelings, sensations, and memories of trauma sometimes become conscious as the psyche repairs itself. This is not the torment of endlessly reliving the past, but part of genuine recovery from it.

Why are these things buried? Consciousness contracts after trauma. It withdraws from the world and higher functions like reflection and reason to focus its energies on stabilizing its basic unconscious structure. Awareness of the painful event itself often disturbs this process. Thus the trauma manifests as amnesia and denial: the inabilities to remember and to admit.

The form of amnesia we see in movies rarely occurs, so why do so many such movies continue drawing crowds? Because another form of amnesia is epidemic. In fact, it is called infant or childhood amnesia. Who remembers their birth or their first years? More to the point, who would want to? People and even “science” generally hold that memory does not reach back that far. But uncivilized and relatively untraumatized civilized people demonstrate something else, casually recounting details of leaving the womb, meeting their parents outside, and encountering the world around them for the first time.

Denial is not a moral failure. It is unconscious success. Trauma of such devastating nature usually occurs in infancy. It easily overwhelms an infant’s structurally fragile consciousness. Denial prevents trauma from shattering basic psychic integrity, which would cause death (and sometimes does in SIDS: Sudden Infant Death Syndrome). Denial is maintained until the psyche heals enough for one to bear witness to the horror of what has been denied.

In darkness, denial begins to lift and traumatic events are remembered or acknowledged. Frozen feelings resurface, along with the general capacity for feeling. Insight comes. The organism paces this sometimes intense process with great care. The fact that it is happening proves you have the capacity to handle it.

Gaining confidence in this capacity can take time. In protocol/discomfort, I describe some ways I learned to moderate intense memory and feeling in darkness. In a series of reports, I have recorded my experiences in darkness of beginning to heal from deep trauma.

What trauma? I mean the routine brutality of our lifeway, which touches virtually everyone from before birth. I mean not just the bad things we condemn, but those we mistakenly accept. As if nature hadn’t already worked out every detail from the beginning of time.

I’m going to list common examples of the plague of polite violence I refer to. My editor, a deeply wise and loving man, has warned me I will lose readers by doing so. I see no way around it. Here’s hoping you can take it.

  • unintentional conception and ambivalent pregnancy
  • outside birth management (doctor, midwife, priest, etc)
  • post-partum attachment failure (through exhaustion, physical separation, and emotional unavailability)
  • vaccination, circumcision, formula-milk, illegal public nursing
  • cribs, playpens, strollers (the worst designs of all time, crystalizing alienation in the nervous systems of billions)
  • television, computers, games (screen technology causes not mere atrophy, but lifelong damage to the imaginative faculty when much used at critical phases of development. 6)
  • factory food (including chemical farming, unripe harvesting, genetic modification, irradiation)
  • absent, pushover, smothering, and abusive parents
  • nannies and day care
  • and finally, the last nail so big it splinters the coffin: school

Of exactly what brutalized you, you may already have some idea. I invite you to find out for sure for yourself in darkness, where you have a real chance to recover from it. Between retreats, the depth psychologists mentioned below can also help provide words for what you are going through.

Let’s finally get it through our desensitized skulls: no one can get brutalized day in and day out for years without being affected. We are not indestructible. We are vulnerable to injury. This vulnerability is not a flaw. It is the conditional nature of organic existence that makes our spectacular adaptability possible. Personal failure results not from weakness. It simply indicates psychophysical malfunction resulting from deep damage, which was not our faults. We are not bad. We are hurt.

From this damage, we need time to heal. Psychic trauma is real. It is deep. It persists through generations until it heals.7 Meanwhile, it disrupts everything else in our lives, motivating us to take it seriously. We can heal from it. We just need basic, decent conditions in which to do so: rest in well-ventilated, quiet, dark solitude.

Lastly, unconscious psychic trauma often expresses itself somatically: as physical illness. If you are physically ill, you may well find psychic wounds underneath your condition, wounds of surprising intensity. These wounds are doors. On the other side of them lie unexpected paths back to physical health.

Much of this comes straight out of modern depth psychology: Wilhelm Reich, Jean Liedloff, Frederick Leboyer, Arthur Janov, Alice Miller, Joseph Chilton Pearce. In describing routine civilized brutality, they took heroic stands for humanity. Only, they did not imagine the psyche could repair itself without therapy.

Suffice it to say I’m no scientific materialist. This quaint philosophy holds that humans are so special nature has exempted us from from its laws; and that anything generated through science (and by civilization itself) is inherently good. Find excellent elaborations of the humor in this idea in Ishmael by Daniel Quinn and Rupert Sheldrake’s critique of scientism.

The human organism is resilient in some ways and vulnerable in others. Darkness provides our autonomic selves the opportunity to fully put these qualities to healthy use, righting unfathomable wrongs.

psychosis

We call situations and each other crazy all the time. But what if our colloquialism proved clinically accurate?

Sages throughout history have observed in us civilized people a pattern of mass functional psychosis. Mass means universal. Functional means able to survive long enough to raise children to reproducibility. Broadly, psychosis means psychic illness: trauma, exhaustion, toxification—absorption of poisonous ideas, attitudes, emotions, and behavior—and the resulting dysfunction in thinking, feeling, and moving intelligences. Dysfunction lead to failure and displeasure both physically, emotionally, and intellectually. Sure enough, sickness, unhappiness, and confusion (or dogmatism) characterize civilize people. This is the principal sign of our psychosis.

Narrowly, psychosis means the inability to distinguish reality from fantasy. Our particular fantasy is that the sliver of reality we are aware of makes up the whole of reality. Anything that doesn’t fit into our postage stamp-worldview gets ignored or crushed. We can’t directly help it. It’s the inevitable pathology of mass major psychic trauma.

The sliver consists of the grossest part of reality. Scientists call it spacetime: three maneuverable dimensions of space with one dimension of time, the present, frozen in a forward motion. Being sensible, spacetime is especially amenable to intellection. Thus our hypermental lifeway. We emphasize thinking at the expense of feeling and, to some extent, action. Obsessive control of this sliver enables enough of us to survive each generation to imagine we are doing as well as can be expected.

Some of us find this imagining delusional given the widespread examples of mass psychosis that abound among us:

  • righteous wars against the innocent
  • controls in the name of rights and freedom
  • poverty amidst mind-boggling wealth
  • useless work and wearisome recreation
  • undernourished overfeeding
  • confusing philosophy and soulless religion
  • alienation—civilization’s calling card
  • depression, anxiety, schizophrenia
  • lifestyle diseases (cancer, diabetes, cardiovascular disease)
  • stupifying education
  • sickening health care

That’s just for starters. No doubt you can supply your own. Perhaps you have wept over the world’s desperate madness. Perhaps you have wept over your own.

Normally, calling something crazy halts further consideration and conversation. After all, “you can’t fix crazy.” So what use is it to think or talk about it? Is it even craziness, or is it just human nature, as we have long assumed? Religion is helpless. Conventional psychology has failed to fix it, capitulating to psychiatry’s narcosis. Mass psychosis is the biggest elephant in our room.

I submit, we are actually crazy. We weren’t always. Something went terribly wrong. But we are alive. Therefore, we can recover.

What would we recover?

Awareness of the other basic plane of reality. Because it mirrors spacetime, some scientists are calling it timespace: three dimensions of time—past, present, future—and space compressed to one location. Australian Aboriginals call it dreamtime. They access it at will for daily living. It is how they can track someone 100 miles through the desert a year later with only a scrap of his clothing. Dreamtime is directly perceived through the feeling center, not the senses.

Our feeling centers, being more fragile, are generally out of commission. So to scientific materialists, dreamtime doesn’t exist. They dismiss it out of hand despite the evidence. Which even most civilized people have a little of. I mean strange experiences that stick in the mind unexplained for decades, like personal x-files. Talk about this stuff to regular people and they will call you crazy. Stay in darkness long enough, and access to it promises to return permanently.

If the hygienic view of health and sanity is the brain of my method, and darkroom retreating is the gut—the action—then the testimony of mass functional psychosis is its broken heart. My earlier essay, psychosis records it purely and forcefully.

causation

Pathology is the study of illness and its causation: the chain of cause and effect that leads to symptoms.

Natural Hygiene is radical because it deals unflinchingly in first causes. It begins by observing that health is the normal state of organisms under normal conditions. Life itself started out in integrity and health. Nature cannot generate an entire species otherwise. Disease only occurs when something goes wrong with conditions, when harmful ones are present and beneficial ones are absent or in poor proportion.

This gives hygiene a rational standard for evaluating conditions proposed as beneficial. Hygiene asks, what normal relationship to life does this condition have? Did its absence cause or contribute to the disease in the first place? If not, then the proposal can be dismissed.

In the case of using darkness to heal from psychic illness, well, once upon a time, we were deprived the shelter we instinctively sought in order to heal from whatever traumatized us. We got hurt but got no chance to heal. Resting in a darkroom finally addresses this little-noticed intermediate cause of ongoing suffering and illness from trauma.

Why were we deprived? Because directly or indirectly, our parents, our source of shelter, were the source of our trauma as well.

Yes, they suffered a similar trauma from their parents, rendering them incapable of providing us such shelter. They denied us just as they denied their own need for rest, just as their parents conditioned them to and were themselves denied, etc, going back 500 generations.

But each of us exists on many levels, not just such grand ones. On a simpler level, our parents remain responsible for what they have done and not done with us.

So how did trauma begin? Sane people do not routinely hurt their children. Humanity was fine at some point. So the trauma had to originate externally. I don’t know exactly what, but I guess a natural super-catastrophe in our distant past did it. Fact is, big rocks fly around space at high speeds. Occasionally, one lands here with unhappy consequences. Maybe we are the butt of an accidental cosmic joke.

If so, then our wars, big and small, are pointless. No one started it. Everybody is innocent. So everybody is free to heal.

In life on Earth, prevention of all trauma is futile. Hope lies in having a way to recover from it.8

psychology

In light of the traumatic origin of disease, hygienic principles, and restful use of darkness, a hygienic psychology can now be outlined:

  1. As organisms, we start out whole, functional, and happy.
  2. Early major psychic trauma from civilization’s routine brutality leaves us damaged, malfunctioning, and suffering.
  3. The psyche, as an organic system, will heal itself.
  4. Healing primarily requires rest due to the homeostasis, stillness, and extra vital energy it makes possible.
  5. Profound psychic rest occurs autonomically in absolute, physical darkness.
  6. Therefore, by resting in darkness, we are restored to wholeness, function, and happiness.

Natural Hygiene upholds basic findings of psychology from several traditions. Hygiene merely shrugs at psychology’s conscious over-involvement in the unconscious. The unconscious is competent to fix itself if minimally supported. The conscious is helpless in any case. We are correct in believing we have a problem and need to do something about it. We have been disastrously incorrect about which part of the self has to do it.9

Focusing on deep psychic rest in absolute darkness is new in hygiene. Until now, it has focused on the physiological rest of fasting. Fasting has been hygiene’s ultimate means of dealing with serious illness. At most, hygiene recommends keeping eyes closed during fasts because it reduces the significant work of sensory processing of vision10. A darkroom retreat embodies this principle fully while providing the energy and, frankly, the psychic security of food while repairing underlying psychic systems.

These systems are more fundamental than the digestive and eliminative systems. Darkroom retreating is thus more urgently needed than fasting in most cases.

Furthermore, darkroom retreating is inherently much safer to do alone. Fasting requires basic psychic integrity, self-knowledge, and a solid grasp of hygiene, fasting in particular. Awareness of internal sensations and their meanings becomes clear and fine grained. This integrity and knowledge intensifies motivation to learn hygiene. Thus darkroom retreating will open the door to unsupervised long fasts on a wide scale.

Professional hygienic fasting supervisors attempt to substitute themselves for these prerequisites of fasting or teach them in the usual slow, incomplete way. Consequently, only hundreds of people fast per year in a remotely proper way, not the billions who need to. Darkroom retreating recontexualizes the work of fasting supervisors. Retreating in darkness themselves, they will regain the capacity to operate at a global scale, not just with the lucky few.

As in fasting, one hardly knows in darkness what the organism is doing at its deepest levels. Occasionally there is a chance to consciously participate in the process. Or to find out why things have gone wrong if it is important to change ideas and behavior related to it. Mostly one feels normal, or discomfort, or a strange subterranean rumbling.

But one always knows the result: restoration of function—recovery of the lost self—usually accompanied by feelings of contentedness, presence, and euphoria. Darkroom retreating reveals the marvelous self-healing power of the organism under proper conditions. But for those who have suffered and failed for years with other approaches, the process is nothing less than miraculous. As with the rest of hygiene, time in darkness shows that if one wants a miracle, one need only provide its conditions.

And then? Healed from trauma, one will no longer be compelled to repeat it. One will absorb and redeem its consequences. As with the rest of Natural Hygiene, hygienic psychology’s bad news is much worse, and its good news is far better than anyone dreamed.

The emergence of a hygienic psychology, its identification of trauma at the root of all illness, and its greater importance than fasting have massive implications for hygiene’s pathology and destiny. Hygiene has said illness originates with enervation (low energy) and toxemia. Trauma explains how these conditions themselves originate. And in coming to terms with trauma, Natural Hygiene can finally meet and obsolete allopathy (Western medicine) in its stronghold. I have developed these implications in hygiene notes.

I am only saying enough here to give you a theoretical basis for doing hygienic darkroom retreats. For a thorough introduction to hygiene’s principles, practices, and intriguing history, read Shelton’s The Science and Fine Art of Natural Hygiene.

 

2 - format

We can use darkness in different formats for different reasons. Here, I describe the formats in which I have experienced deep rest and observed positive results in my energy level, psychic state, and general well-being.

I recommend you do them in the following order. First make darkness in your own home for sleeping, then for short retreats (mini-retreats of 11–16 hours and regular retreats of 4–8 days). After becoming familiar with extended darkness at home, a dedicated public darkroom works better for medium-length retreats (9–60 days). Furthermore, your experience at home might inspire you to build such a darkroom yourself. The world will need far more than the handful that exist.

sleep

tonight

Start like this:

Put dark, dense sheet material over your bedroom windows and doors to get relief tonight from most outdoor ambient light.

  • tack or tape up
    • blankets, sleeping bags, dark bedsheets or extra curtains
    • black plastic, carpet, or cardboard
    • or prop up plywood, old doors, or big table tops
    • use whatever you have
  • extend corners of flexible materials as far past door on either side as possible
  • turn off or cover any devices in your room that produce light
  • make sure you have plenty of fresh air, even if it lets in a little light
  • block some of it with a sleeping mask from an airline or travel store; a loose winter hat pulled down, or a dark t-shirt draped over your eyes

We all know how it feels to sleep a lot after too many short nights: we feel sluggish afterwards. Some people call this getting too much sleep, a physiological impossibility. They just do not know how tired people can get and still not get fired from their jobs. In fact, we are tapping into the first layer of a backlog of lost sleep. Feeling groggy is the first phase of catching up. This can take days. Reversing sleep deprivation is like withdrawing from strong drug. Like me, you may need a retreat to get to the other side of it without backsliding.

In the meantime, this format helps us remember just how important darkness is. When you decide you want perfect darkness for sleeping nightly, make blackout blinds and lightproof vents so your room is dark, airy, and easily reopened to light during the day.

nightly

We require total darkness to sleep well. No one is an exception to this. You may be able to fall asleep despite the street light right outside your bedroom, but only at the expense of overall function (the Law of Vital Accommodation). The circadian system has not changed one iota since industrialization. It never gets used to anything. If light intrudes on your sleep, it will signal the circadian system to make your sleep less deep and restful, whether you know it or like it or not. It’s like what many clients told me after their retreats: “I had no idea how tired I was.”

From simply darkening his bedroom, a friend reported to me a huge difference in the quality of sleep he and his mate experienced, as well as a return of vivid dreams. I have experienced the same thing whenever I have been able to darken the room I sleep in. As a rule, the darker the room, the better the sleep. 100% darkness is 1000% better than a 99.9% dark room. Extinguishing that last bit of light leaves the mind nothing to hang onto, giving new meaning to “falling asleep”. See for yourself.

It is best to go to sleep early, from 18:00 to 22:00 at the absolute latest. Then one naturally awakens about 4 hours later for 1-3 hours. At this hour, one is freshly rested, yet the promise of sleep lies ahead. The world outside is quieter; children are asleep; the mind runs more slowly; and inhibitions are slightly relaxed.

Thus sex can be especially gratifying. Many consider it an auspicious hour for meditation or prayer. Use a candle or other dim, warm lighting. Avoiding the cold blue tint of some LEDs, which signals the circadian system to awaken. Light exercise, light reading, and light snacking (on fruit) are fine, too. And perhaps a menial chore or two. But avoid more serious work. It stimulates too much waking thought and distract from getting back to sleep when tired again.

Usually sleep goes 3-4 more hours. It is deliciously renewing. A nap in the early afternoon, as short as 20 minutes, will refresh you yet again. That is, if you can stand feeling this good.

Before widespread public lighting, this was a common sleeping pattern. It’s called biphasic or segmented sleep. It is natural and retreating strongly resets it. If it happens to you, don’t consider it strange, but a normal part of human life recovered.

Many aspects of modern life seem increasingly out of control. Blackout blinds offer the unique thrill of reclaiming control over one of the most basic functions of existence: sleeping and waking. Neither the sun nor streetlighting nor scheduling accidents determine anymore when you wake up. You do, and only when you are good and ready.

retreat

short

mini-retreat

Note: I do not recommend mini-retreats for everyone, just if you feel strongly called to it and find yourself able to do it without cutting corners. I cannot do them properly, so I don’t try anymore. I just include it because I saw it was possible and I can imagine there are people whose capacity and circumstances makes it appropriate.

A mini-retreat allows you to dip your toe into retreating while keeping your usual schedule. It includes the two primary phases of a retreat: sleeping long and deeply, and being awake by yourself without distraction for some hours in the middle of the night.

It is the same as sleeping nightly in darkness except you:

  • turn off lights by 20:00*
  • maintain darkness whether or not you wake up in the middle of the night
  • get 1-2 extra sleeps in the morning
  • stay in darkness 12–16 hours*

A mini-retreat helps maintain restedness between 4- and 8-day retreats. Some benefits of retreating fade and at different rates. To extend them and smooth the transition to the moment of needing to retreat again, do a mini-retreat once a week between regular retreats.

CAUTION: Do not start a mini-retreat after 20:00, nor stay in longer than 16 hours. These are the two unsafe ways I have found to use darkness. They induced mild shock and very negative feelings and thoughts in me that took a 4-day retreat to recover from.

In retreat, the organism strongly resets natural biological rhythms. Namely, going to sleep whenever tired, especially at nightfall. If you can’t start your mini-retreat on time, postpone it till you can. Starting regular retreats an hour or two late is less than ideal, but it still works because the organism has time to compensate. This is not the case with mini-retreating.

The human organism in darkness seems to go through a 2–3 day cycle with a point of no return 16–18 hours in. So either exit before going past this point or complete the cycle. Otherwise you may experience very negative consequences. It’s like jumping out of a Ferriss wheel after it has gone too far up. Read my blog post, how not to retreat, for a longer explanation.

Biological rhythms are very powerful and apparently cannot be messed with in this way. So, better safe than sorry, at least until you have retreated enough to feel confident about experimenting with mini-retreats.

4-day retreat

Note: I no longer recommend 4-day retreats for most people. Do it only if it feels too long for you or your circumstances disallow an 8-day retreat within two months. It is much better to begin with an 8-day retreat. If you really need rest, a 4-day retreat will just get your head above water without beginning to address what put it under in the first place. If you are truly well-rested, a 4-day retreat will not be enough for you to have a strong experience of yourself in darkness. I can’t help feeling caught in a whirlpool made of a long string of 4-day retreats. If you do one, just do one. Do read the following section as the 8-day retreat section builds on it.

Once your darkening and ventilating measures are working smoothly for nightly use and mini-retreats, you can easily add the remaining elements of a darkroom for a regular retreat. Everyone interested in a 4-day retreat can try one. Though not guaranteed, it is possible to catch up on all the sleep one ever lost in as little as 48 hours of darkness. The amount of deep sleep that can be had in such a short amount of time is impossible to conceive beforehand and hard to believe even after experiencing it. While the effects do not go very deep or last long, you can regain hope, register a memory of feeling very good, learn how to be in darkness, and get a clearer idea about how and when to do future retreats.

Timing of regular retreats is a bit more flexible than mini-retreats. Plan to turn off lights between 18:00 and 20:00. If something comes up and you are a little late, it’s ok. But if you start after 22:00 due to scheduling, insomnia, anxiety, or addiction, add an extra day and night of darkness to your retreat. This, by the way, is how to begin seriously interrupting these illnesses. The effect of such a short retreat will likely be temporarily. But at least you’ll glimpse the light at the end of the tunnel.

In accordance with the natural diurnal cycle, go into darkness in the evening and come out in the morning. Just stay in extra days. This makes the dark part of a retreat 2.5 days (60 hours). Avoid checking the time. Use a cellphone alarm set to a specific day to know when the retreat is over.

Besides sleeping as much as possible, eating, eliminating, and bathing, what does one do in darkness without work, people, or media? Light exercise and restful placement of attention. I explain more about the latter in protocol/attention.

Afterward, slowly re-adjust to light. You did not just watch a matinee in a dark cinema, but spent days in total darkness. Sudden exposure to daylight would be a painful and unnecessary shock. Spend a minimum of 15 minutes gradually relighting the room by opening the door and window panels a few millimeters at a time.

It takes time to properly readjust to light and ordinary life. So a period of unstressed transition back to it is just as important as darkness itself. For every three days of darkness, allow at least 24 hours of continued rest, but with sunlight during the day.

Hormones need time to rebalance. Retreating certainly feels like a chemical process. Long periods of darkness can temporarily affect your sense of balance. And it takes time to reflect on what just happened with yourself in darkness, to begin integrating the changes, extra energy, and value of the retreat.

So spend the transition quietly. First, uncover the windows. Visit with no one. Take a slow walk or two and sunbathe outside. Take a nap, covering the windows for it if you like. Then cover the windows by 20:00 and spend the whole night again in darkness.

After your last sleep, slowly uncover the windows. Consider your retreat finished by noon at the latest.

Ease back into your regular life. I mean avoid non-routine activities the first week. You will likely continue to notice effects from the retreat. Due to their dreamlike intensity, I call this the aftermath. See protocol/post-retreat.

If your location has no running water, it’s no problem. For this short of a period, it is unnecessary. See the “bathroom” section of make for a short list of requirements.

8-day retreat

This is the most beneficial retreat I have yet experienced and the best way for most people to begin retreating. Most people who can retreat for four days can go eight days and benefit more than twice as much. The organism’s response to darkness is cumulative; the healing process deepens every day.

Many of my early clients felt like they were just beginning to get somewhere when their 4-day retreat ended. And some were either so wound up or so rested to begin with that 48 hours was not enough for them to get anywhere, whether with their exhaustion or their inner struggle. So I upgraded my darkroom to handle 8-day retreats for first-timers. Sure enough, they did fine and expressed greater satisfaction with their retreats than 4-day retreatants. Scheduling a first retreat of 8 days insures a breakthrough of some kind is made. (And I can imagine in some very crystallized cases, longer still will be necessary for defenses and controls to dissolve enough to make progress back to health.)

An 8-day retreat is like a 4-day retreat except:

  • after physical restedness is reached, a major psychic issue can arise
  • with that, another cycle of emotional discomfort and resolution usually occurs
  • two days of transition are needed afterwards
  • a bathing facility is needed for emotional as well as physical reasons. For remote locations, see “bathroom” section of make for how to make a portable indoor shower.

Only go 4 days if 8 days feels like too much or if you simply haven’t time in the next couple months. Trust your feeling about this. Life and healing move slowly. So can you now that you have found a realistic way to heal from all the pain and illness in your life.

medium

A medium retreat lasts a week to two months (of dark/non-transition days). The process will go really deep. It’s best to get away from all accustomed influences and associations to minimize internal obstacles.

Now that you know what you’re doing in darkness, it’s worth paying extra for this. Take a trip at least a couple hours away. Find a darkroom on another continent if necessary. Pay a retreat center to make one for you according to the instructions in this book. Or rent a perfectly and fully functioning small place and darken it yourself, arranging for maintenance and support.

The darkroom needn’t be fancy, but it must work in every way without compromise of function. Someone else, a maintenance person, should have the responsibility of keeping it that way. There’s nothing like mechanical issues to ruin a retreat.

Yet another person, a supporter, should be available all the time to make sure you have food, basic comforts, someone to talk to for a few minutes if really necessary. By now you will know you are doing one of the most important things of your entire life. Prepare accordingly.

The benefit of short retreats is impressive but still shallow. Doing a lot of them does not equal doing a few long ones. The law of diminishing returns combines with the frustration of glimpsed but unrealized potential to make sour punch. Boldly escalate the length of your retreats.

Personally, I have been stuck in a rut of short retreats. My goal is to retreat for 20 days (including 5 transition days). In 2008, in my second successful retreat, I had a hunch: in two weeks of darkness I will heal from my psychic trauma at the core. This will enable me to put the rest of my life back together afterwards. I do not know exactly how long others would have to retreat to reach the same point. Some people I have talked to and who have been considering this for awhile seem to get hunches about it like I did. It makes sense that people come to know what they need the more of it they get.

long

A long retreat lasts two months to a year. I have heard several reports of retreats like this. All had results we would consider miraculous but which are well within the capacity of the human organism. It made itself under difficult circumstances. Under ideal circumstances, it is certainly able to remake itself. Perhaps better than new.

Stories persist of astonishing physical healing occurring in Ayurvedic darkroom retreats lasting 3-12 months: recovering lost hair and eyesight; growing new teeth; and even recovering youth itself. It seems worth looking into.

future

I would like to find the simplest way health, including sanity, can be fully restored in one shot. Like perfect healing of a broken bone. To this end, I would like to see hygienic retreat centers worldwide with facilities and support for:

  • medium and long darkroom retreats
  • fasts (a la Albert Mosseri’s groundbreaking method)
  • physical retraining
  • training in healthy lifeway, including both lifestyle and livelihood
  • open source research and development of the above
  • a village residence for staff, family, friends, and guests, where all this gets applied and tested in real life

In 3-16 months, one would be:

  • restored to full function and vitality
  • prepared to maintain it in daily life
  • prepared to deal with the residue of the past

For a few years, I focused on designing and building public darkrooms. Then came a few more years of making and helping individuals make private darkrooms at home. As a consultant, I am also available to help:

  • operators of public dedicated darkrooms for medium retreats
  • those with existing centers wishing to include hygienic darkroom retreating in their programs
  • developers of such hygienic retreat centers as I just described

Those who support hygienic darkroom retreating are eligible for my future network, through which I can refer clients to you. Write me for more info.

conclusion

It may take a few generations of healthy living to fully restore our health and realize our potential as human beings. But we can make huge strides, perhaps most of the way back, in our lifetimes.

Now that we have examined different formats of the restful use of darkness for different circumstances and purposes, let’s look ahead to more of what happens in a retreat and exactly how to conduct it.

3 - protocol

How to be and what to do once in darkness is simple. It’s a lot like having a guest. Provide what is necessary for function and comfort, then stay out of the way.

As with the rest of hygiene, the practice of darkroom retreating consistently follows the theory. In hygiene, our purpose is to serve life. Life’s needs are our priorities. This makes our task in darkness simple and clear: maintain the conditions of rest. This leaves the autonomic self free to return the whole being to health and function as quickly as possible. The autonomic self does most of the work, all the complicated parts, and indicates to the volitional self how to help.

Darkroom retreating is nothing less than recovery of the lost self. In darkness, you will begin to reunite with yourself, as if a peg-legged sailor awoke one day to find his leg starting to grow back. The more that happens, the more you become your own guide. This chapter helps you navigate your first retreats and remains as a map.

Hygienic darkroom retreating is new, and I am new at it. The final authority in hygiene is life itself. Consider these notes from the field and an invitation to explore an idea whose time has come.

mechanics

logistics

I describe the overall process of retreating in format/4 & 8-day retreat. Here are the details.

  • food
    • the day your retreat begins, eat the same way you will in darkness: just fruit and greens or as simply as you can
    • finish eating for the day by 18:00
  • retreating
    • in your bedroom:
      • neutralize it: cover or store everything unnecessary to the retreat
      • clean it thoroughly
      • pad sharp corners and protrusions
    • at a center
      • arrive at 18:00
      • your supporter will:
        • show you to your room, pointing out where food will be delivered and any special features
        • find out particular things you need
        • talk to you a little bit about the retreat, reiterating the basic ideas of rest and self-healing
      • as you unpack and settle in, memorize the room. Close your eyes and practice moving around and finding things
  • set two alarms on a cellphone
    • between 10:00 and 12:00 the first day you will uncover the windows. On transition days, you can open the room before noon, as early as 06:00, as long as you feel fully rested.
    • between 06:00 and 12:00 the morning your retreat will end, depending on your schedule.
    • turn cellphone off or put it in flight mode to stop calls and minimize electromagnetic radiation
  • lights out
    • how to do everything in a totally dark room: slowly!
    • Important: when bending down or rising, hold your hands together, out in front of yourself at chest height so you don’t hit your head. Practice this a few times in light with eyes closed, near something you will touch with your hands
    • put food scraps in bucket provided inside the room
    • things slowly go out of place in darkness. If you would like the bed remade, lost shoes found, etc, just let your supporter know.
    • If you discover a light leak, immediately look away and get something to cover it with. See prepare/things to bring for materials to do this with. Let your supporter know so leak can be plugged.
    • Use scratch paper and pen to write notes to your supporter. Put them in the agreed-upon spot for messages.
    • Avoid all media during your retreat: text, music, photos, video.
    • Avoid all company as well: family, friends, etc, unless
      • you are a parent and your child needs to be with you
      • perhaps if your retreat is longer than two weeks (I don’t know yet)
  • transition day(s)
    • take walks, lie in the sun on the grass, go barefoot,
    • take naps, re-covering windows if you like
    • maintain solitude
    • write about your retreat
    • cover windows again between 18:00 and 20:00
    • maintain darkness until morning
  • last morning
    • finish writing about your retreat
    • pack and exit room by 13:00

water & exercise

I make sure I do two things in darkness:

  • drink water: the body uses water for virtually all its processes. Detection of dehydration is strangely harder in darkness. Each day, drink about 1 liter for every 20 kg you weigh. Get enough bottles to hold that much. Keep them by your bed. Fill and drink them down every day. Simple.

    With all its extra energy, the body is reopening old wounds. It needs water to repair, clean, and revive these tissues. It is shaking toxins loose and needs water to wash them out. It soaks the nerves in water to keep them cool. This makes time in darkness emotionally smoother.

  • exercise: exercise helps one get to sleep, avoid bed soreness, feel less restless and irritable, retard muscle atrophy, and, interestingly, maintain the psychophysical “space” in which healing occurs. Even three minutes a day makes the difference between a pleasant retreat and constant discomfort. After the first couple days, I find I want to exercise more and more. It becomes a game: how many pushups can I do? I have rarely felt such motivation as an adult. It came as a very pleasant surprise.

food

Eat meals rather than snacks. When you are hungry, focus on eating until you feel full and satisfied. The human alimentary tract processes food in batches, not continuously. A constant stream of food (often eaten in boredom) disrupts and distresses digestion, thus sleep, attention, and healing.

You will probably need 25-50% less food, by calories, than usual. I recommend keeping it to fresh, raw, ripe fruit and leafy greens to maximize nutrition, elimination, and psychic agility. Keep food in a cooler with a block of ice. Eat as much as you like. It is likely that your appetite will be diminished due to extra melatonin in the blood (a reason we do not get hungry when we sleep). This was especially noticeable in my first retreat.

As much as 10% of your food, by mass, can be tender leafy greens like leaf lettuce (not iceberg) and baby spinach. Celery, too. This is the equivalent of 1 large head or bunch of greens per day total.

A minimum of 90% of your food, by mass, should be seeded fruit, sweet and non-sweet (like tomatoes, bell peppers, cucumbers). So salads can be sweet (greens mixed with sweet fruit) and savory (greens mixed with non-sweet fruit).

Our need for fat is tiny and easily met with the above food types. Fat is very complex and difficult to digest. Too much interferes with resting and healing. So eliminate oils and minimize fatty foods. Forego nuts and seeds altogether. One small to medium avocado during a 4-day retreat in a savory salad is very pleasant.

Most of what you consume in fruit and leafy greens is water. So you must eat 3-5 times more volume for the same sense of fullness and satisfaction. Eating this much can take getting used to. Practice it before the retreat.

For more about food, see hygiene/food and prepare/menu, The 80/10/10 Diet by Dr Douglas Graham, and Loren Lockman’s videos.

I strongly believe in fasting. It is a cornerstone of hygiene. But I believe in keeping these two processes separate until regaining significant capacity. They seem to have opposite metabolic requirements. At first, healing in darkness is more psychical in nature, in fasting more physical. The activity of one supports the inactivity and resting of the other. I have tried both at the same time and it is very intense. I look forward to more, but for now, I am taking one at a time. I recommend the same to you till you receive strong clear opposite signals from your organism.

support

My ideas of support have evolved since my first retreat. Once a day, Finn brought me food and talked to me a few minutes. For my first clients, I did more of each, sometimes too much. I thought of myself as a facilitator.

Then a client wanted to communicate with notes and clapping in response to my questions. One clap meant no; two, yes; three, repeat the question. His retreat was up to him and he knew it. He just wanted mechanical support.

I liked this a lot. It eased my worries and helped me trust in life more. I started thinking of myself as a supporter. I later retreated without support and much preferred the solitude.

I and my clients generally liked having a supporter for our first retreats. We found it reassuring to say a few words to someone each day. But then, none of us had this book! You only need someone to bring you food if you retreat longer than four days; with good planning, eight. It’s common sense to have a fully charged cellphone and someone nearby to call in case of emergency. If you do have a supporter, here are the conditions:

  • duties and qualifications. A supporter:
    • has read this book, understanding the basic ideas of hygiene; expertise is not required
    • is reliable; and has a modicum of common sense
    • brings food and checks for notes or says hello according to an agreed schedule (noon works well). Saying hello/how are you can happen once a day, once in the middle of the retreat, or not at all
    • has retreated or will soon. No neutral or tacitly negative supporters!
  • design
    • a supporter can deliver food and talk to the retreatant in a normal voice without opening the darkroom’s door
    • a supporter can enter the darkroom without letting in light. Or, the retreatant covers her eyes till the door is shut again
    • a retreatant can call the supporter without leaving the room or being exposed to light
    • see design and make chapters for ways to do these

attitude

You need two things to retreat hygienically: a darkroom and knowledge of the hygienic attitude. You don’t have to believe it. Just take it in with you to consider, test, and use when the opportunity arises. It is not something to impose on yourself, to make yourself do, but to recognize in the moment and respond to. It’s a chance to let go, to let life catch you. In some way, you already know how to do this. These words can help you feel more confident about it.

purpose

  • The purpose of a darkroom retreat is to rest deeply. This enables the organism, especially the psyche, to heal itself of the major psychophysical trauma sustained in civilization that causes all suffering, including physical disease.
  • Your principal task is to sleep. Benefits of the deep sleep possible in darkness compound each day. Deep sleep enables the organism to accumulate tremendous vital energy. This energy is necessary to heal deep psychophysical injuries that lie way beyond the reach of will, surgery, or practice.
  • onsider any spiritual, personal developmental, or therapeutic purpose to which you might put this retreat as part of what you are retreating from. Really: feel free to let it all go in here. Whatever is valid will happen by itself, much better than you imagined it would. If somehow you can’t let it go, it’s ok. Sometimes the ability to let go must be recovered, too, as well as confidence in the autonomic self to handle what you let go of.
  • Likewise, the autonomic functions of the organism will deal with most of what we often regard as our moral responsibilities. Darkroom retreating is not primarily an active process (like spiritual practice). It is primarily a passive process as regards the will, requiring minimal effort on your part. It is like waiting in a hospital bed to heal.

    Thus, you do not need to make yourself meditate, pray, chant, introspect, think hard, figure out your life, etc. Neither stop yourself from any of these if you feel moved to do so. Yes, you actually get to consider your feelings, impulses, thoughts, and needs in darkness. Everything in your being plays a part in life. Anything could be an important cue. Every movement of the organism ultimately has health as its aim. Listen, wait, receive.

  • It is quite possible to have a goal for a retreat and make progress with it. I did this several times. But now I know it was out of lack of confidence in my autonomic self. My aims were security objects. This kind of purposefulness interferes with the organism’s priorities, which cannot be improved upon. Life always knows what is actually most important, millisecond by millisecond. My most effective retreat happened when I felt sure it would not work and I gave up on any aim I might have had. I only continued out of sheer logic: my own arguments still seemed airtight and unavoidable, so I stuck with the plan. Then I witnessed a marvel of self-healing.
  • This process is as foolproof as possible. Given the conditions of rest—most of which are built into the room itself—you will heal.
  • The organism is the principal actor. Your job is to support its self-healing process through stillness and conserving energy, including the energy expended by attention. (More about attention later.)

expectations

  • You will get a distinct break from your regular life. It’s best to consider anything more a bonus. While I and some others I supported have experienced amazing occurrences in darkness, I cannot guarantee you will experience them.
  • Your results are up to your whole self, 99.99% of which operates below the level of conscious awareness, beyond your direct control.

    I do guarantee that your being will do exactly what is most necessary and not require more of you than you can handle. Perfect, complete knowledge of everything about you and absolute power to act on this knowledge are the autonomic self’s great gifts for you.

  • As when wandering the streets of a foreign city, keep your wits about you. Neither your supporter nor your autonomic self will relieve you of the normal task of watching over your own life. You remain responsible for yourself.
  • If nothing happens, conditions were not met sufficiently. Analyze the points of failure and try again. Several of my early retreats failed because of light leaks, poor air quality, noise, a bad bed, time shortage, and other stressors. While darkness is natural, one still has to learn to arrange and use it. I’m still learning.

attention

What do you do in a retreat?

As I’ve said many times, you rest. But how, exactly? Half the day, you’re lying around awake with nothing to do.

The answer has to do with attention. While the autonomic self heals, the volitional self focuses attention. We have no choice about having attention. We sort of have a choice about where to focus it.

I say sort of because this power varies with capacity. This takes time to recover. Meanwhile, sometimes attention wanders like an untethered goat. Sometimes it dashes off madly. Sometimes it gently returns seeking direction.

Attention is different than the mind. Attention can be on the mind: its actions, thoughts, and memories. It can also be on feeling, sensation, and movement.

Don’t fight the goat of attention. It is an injured animal that must remain free. Direct it when possible. When it wanders, you track and observe it a little while, then direct it. When it dashes, you hang on for dear life or, in critical moments, take it firmly in hand and direct it. When it returns, you direct it. You direct it because your purpose is to rest and certain objects of attention are more restful than others. You direct it when you can, as your capacity to do so returns.

I know three places and ways to restfully direct attention:

  1. mentally on thoughts, above and behind the head, a couple minutes at a time
  2. visually on darkness, in front of the eyes, for 5-10 minutes at a time
  3. palpably and audibly on bodily rhythyms, for hours at a time:
    • on breathing, in the belly
    • on the pulse, anywhere and eventually in the heart
    • on swallowing
    • on blinking

These are all good places for attention. It just depends on what resting requires in any given moment. For example, avoiding thought about something that demands it in the moment will be agitating, not restful. Remember the purpose of rest, and you will learn when and where to move your attention.

Conscious placement of attention on the self, on some aspect of consciousness is usually called meditation. (Gurdjieff, in his usual precision, called it self-remembrance). Thus darkroom retreating sounds like meditation to many people. Meditation is usually a discipline. This is true only when time is set aside just for it, when it is the main process. The moment this effort stops, so does the main process.

In darkness, meditation serves the retreat. One retreats not for meditation but rest. Healing is the main process. Meditation can help sometimes, but healing goes on anyway because it is an autonomic process running in the background of willed activity. Further, a retreat provides so many conditions of rest and so little to do, one tends to rest more.

  • Thinking is sometimes critically important. When you have presence of mind and a pressing issue arises, think it through logically, steadily making rational connections until resolving it. This doesn’t happen much or take long, and we all know how thinking too much can drive a person crazy. Fortunately, thinking is not the only option.
  • You can also look directly at darkness itself, making it an object of attention. We are usually taught to think of darkness as nothing or as a background for something lit. Focusing on darkness for awhile as an external fact, eyes open or closed, helps calm the mind. It can be unexpectedly absorbing.

    Try it right now for a minute or two. Put your palms over your eyes. Slightly overlap them above the nose to seal out light. Look at the backs of your eyelids like you are looking a couple meters away. Do this for a few minutes. Shapes and colors and spots might move around for awhile, then slowly clear away. Focus on the slowest dark patches, sometimes in front of, sometimes behind the imagery. You are withdrawing all your senses back inside your head.

    You can also do this in the middle of a regular day to rapidly collect yourself, to feel centered and in your body again. It is restful for the eyes. It is actually an old practice from hygiene called “palming”.

    I used to do it for hours, even days. This was way too much. You can read the trouble I got into for this in my 6-day retreat. Increasingly clear images of a subjective nature play on the “screen” of darkness. In other words, the images are coming from the mind. At first I found this fascinating. Then it became torturous and nightmarish. At first, it seemed meaningless. Now I think it reflects what is repressed or denied in oneself. But this is nothing to indulge or dismiss. The unconscious will tell us what we need to know of it.

In a retreat, focus on darkness like this for just 5-10 minutes, concentrating on it a moment to steady yourself. Then…

  • Move attention into your gut to feel the movement of breathing. This is always safe, a shelter from the storm sometimes raging in the mind. I can calmly hang out there for hours while lying down, palpating the motion of breathing. Just the in-and-out of my belly where natural breathing occurs (not in the chest).
  • Then put attention on the pulse, sometimes feeling for it in the heart. From sensation to feeling is not very far. I heard from Arnaud Desjardins, a great master of Advaita, that eventually, one can put attention in the heart as pure feeling.
  • Swallowing and blinking provide further variety to the show. The tongue normally rests against the roof of the mouth. Of course, if you are congested and must breathe through your mouth, this is impossible.
  • Many have reported occasionally seeing unusual lights and images. These have a highly real objective quality, bracing, awesome, compelling. Vaulted ceilings often figure into this scenery, sometimes low, dark, and grey or brown; sometimes high, airy, lit, and colored. Some consider these hallucinations. Darkness impresses me as a waking portal to the dreamworld, also called dreamtime or timespace.

experience

conservation

  • talk only if necessary. Chatting drains energy.
  • learn to write in darkness so you can communicate with a supporter and take notes on your experience. Use a notebook. Turn the page after writing or whenever you are in doubt about having turned it. Use your non-writing hand to cover the last line and guide your pen.
  • for a more concentrated experience, do a silent retreat
  • if you usually talk to yourself, catch yourself and stop
  • at first, my clients and I felt like leaving the facility quickly upon exiting the darkroom and throwing ourselves back into ordinary life. This was due to an unaccustomed increase in energy level and well-being. We had a sharpened sense of anticipation about our lives, feeling more in our bodies and ready to conquer the world. But rather than immediately re-enter regular life and probably end up blowing off this extra energy, it is better to recirculate it, absorb it, stabilize it.

    So now the retreat continues after darkness with windows uncovered and doors opened during the day one day for every 2-3 darkened days. This gives time to re-orient to light and gravity. Take a walk, look at nature, and reflect on what has happened. See format and, in my blog, post-retreat protocol for more about this.

time

Many of us in darkness have experienced a strange compulsion to know what time it is. It feels like an intense addiction. Darkness gives the best possible opportunity to withdraw from it by avoiding finding out.

I often feel late, short on time, rushed, like I’m running behind. Yet, at the end of a retreat, in which days passed with accomplishing regular tasks, I always feel luxuriously ahead of schedule. So I view the late feeling as a symptom of exhaustion and asynchrony: time disorientation.

The civilized sense of time is very close to the heart of our psychosis. The indigenous report a very different experience of time. They feel in time, on time, in synchrony with the flow of events. Where we mostly measure time cardinally, with specific dates and hours, they mostly measured it ordinally: before, after, earlier, later.

Feel for yourself this strange relationship with time we consider so normal.

sex

Sexuality lies close to the core of organic existence, of being human. So close, it often seems indistinguishable from lifeforce. I believe there is something even more basic, but I am not sure yet. In any case, sexuality is a primal form of one’s power to live. Thus state and religion, civilization’s centralizers of power, rabidly suppress it. And thus it often stirs in darkness, like a mad joyful beast rising from captivity. Or if it is already running wild, it cools down. Either way, sexuality makes its presence known.

One of my clients before his retreat was already trying to lure his giggling girlfriend into darkness for “conjugal visits” (!). I recommend just hanging in there. In darkness, this secret joy is just for you. At least for the first weeks. After that, I honestly don’t know.

In the meantime, you may find, as I have, the healing of sexuality directly linked to recovery of self-esteem and feelings of security and confidence; to feelings of shame, fear, and guilt; and to rebelliousness and life purpose. Darkness will definitely help many people heal from and end the nightmare of sexual repression and violence that has beset our lifeway for thousands of years.

I have related some of the initial, liberating effects of darkroom retreating on my sexuality in my reports. Much remains to explore.

difficulty

discomfort

An uncomfortable period usually occurs somewhere in the middle of the retreat, lasting minutes to hours. It’s like a bout of pain while convalescing in a hospital. But now it is the soul that heals.

You might feel tense, like crawling in your skin. You might curl up and cry. It’s perfectly natural. You have provided the organism a chance to work something out, and it is doing so.

  • if lack of movement slowly contributed to discomfort, exercise will instantly help
  • call your supporter if you need company
  • try the techniques in the phobia section
  • sensation functions as a brake on the process. If red light does not help, try music. If you still can’t stand it, use natural light. Apply it by slowly uncovering the window or opening the door as much and long as needed. Start with eyes closed and turned away from the light. Open your eyes, but do not look into the light directly. If this is insufficient, step outside. When you feel calm again, go back into darkness again.

In some case, retreating can feel unbearably difficult. It is perfectly alright to not resume darkness at this time. Darkness is natural, but reaquaintance can take time and must not be rushhed. Perhaps reflection on your experience will show why you could not proceed. Perhaps something unexpected will change and you can try again later. Perhaps something else is more important for your life now. There is no rush.

phobias

Those with phobias related to darkness (eg, superstition, claustrophobia, fear of the dark) can still retreat using these techniques:

  • red light: Keep a red LED light next to your bed (pure red light gives no signal to the pineal gland to wake you up). If anxiety or panic become too great, turn on the light till you feel better.
  • microretreat: retreat for five seconds. Then take a break in red light till you feel ready for the next microretreat. Gradually increase the length of the micro-retreats and decrease the breaks. Do this for 15 minutes. The next night, go 30 minutes, etc.
  • companion: retreat with another person inside or near the darkroom till you feel ok alone
  • reason: go over the facts of your situation in your mind. What evidence do you have for what you fear? You can learn to recognize and dismiss arbitrary (baseless) ideas.*

I had a client from a superstitious culture who was raised to fear the dark. But the idea of resting in darkness appealed to her common sense. She stayed in darkness for a whole night for the first time in her life at my darkroom. Afterward, she said that when her fear of monsters or ghosts came, she simply reasoned her way through it.

She remembered closing and locking the door, then checking under the bed and table and finding nothing before blowing out the candle. The door had not opened since then, so nothing could have gotten in. She deduced there could be no threat. She calmed down and went back to sleep. That night, her fantastic fear yielded to reason four times.

When she awoke in the morning, she felt ecstatic from staying all night in absolute darkness and overcoming her fear of it. Her rationality strengthened, and she used it to strengthen her relationship to reality and her feeling of safety. Allied with her autonomic self, the tide gently turned on her phobia.

In any case, try. If these methods fail, perhaps you will come up with your own in the moment of crisis. An idea will occur to you. You will feel something or have an impulse. Act on it. Darkroom retreating isn’t all just lying around. These brief calls for heroism are part of the minimal effort the retreat requires of everyone at some point.

*I was raised with many superstitions. I found pp155-170 of Objectivism: The Philosophy of Ayn Rand by Leonard Piekoff extremely helpful in dealing with the conscious part of them. He explains how to identify arbitrary ideas: those for which there is no evidence. He explains the necessity of dismissing them.

severe psychosis

As I have said, I view our entire society and virtually everyone in it as psychotic. This includes myself, you, our “leaders”, the lady down the block, doctors. Everyone. We are functionally psychotic, surviving long enough in our dysfunction and pain to reproduce. We thus exist on a continuum of psychosis ranging from the temporarily shocked, to the functional, to the disabled, to the severely psychotic.

Merely this change in perpsective from our current presumptions can aid the situation greatly. Lots of little ridiculous things we currently do can be exposed as such and stopped.

I have not worked with severe psychotics—who would be identified simply as psychotic by conventional psychology. But I think that we can handle even these cases by ourselves. By this, I mean without the use of the professional system or experts, just with the care of friends and family. That said, if an expert can behave normally, simply providing wisdom and care unobtrusively like anyone else would, without any sense of superiority, that’s great. Some experts actually know something. There’s no reason for their knowledge to go to waste unless it would do more harm than good on balance.

I think severely psychotic people will be most helped at first by the influence and love of others who have recovered their own sanity in darkness. Most severely psychotic people are especially sensitive to our society’s constant barrage of studidity and hatred, especially from those who are supposed to care about them. If that reverses, most cases of severe psychosis will disappear in weeks. Let us first put our attention on ourselves. It’s sort of like using an oxygen mask in an airplane: use it yourself first, then on those in your care. To continue the metaphor, please consider the plane we’re on to be already depressurized, undergoing severe turbulence, and with its masks dangling down.

But I can imagine the direct use of darkness in extreme cases to excellent effect. It must be done with great care and attention to conditions, and with understanding and consent. Darkness causes great harm in those it is forced upon, and I unqualifiedly condemn this cruel and despotic use of darkness. I believe it will often require more gradual application and more support.

Begin by removing any light the person has not asked for or replacing it with red light if he finds it agreeable. The more access the person has to reason and the more he trusts his caregivers, the easier it will be to normalize his sleeping environment. Scheduling pressure can be removed. I mean all those therapeutic activities that are supposed to help people but just distress them or help them pass the time while on debilitating medication. Allow the person to sleep more. Provide more fresh, raw fruits and leafy green vegetables, fresh air, sunlight, pure non-fluoridated water, contact with plants and earth, grounding sheets, etc.

Lots of little changes like this can quickly de-escalate severe psychosis to mere disabled psychosis or even functional psychosis. From there, a person could manage the rest of the way to sanity himself.

aftermath

post-retreat

The effects of a retreat continue afterward, sometimes with an intensity greater than the retreat’s. It can feel like a storm sometimes. So I call it the aftermath. This is another phase of exploration, metamorphosis, and insight. It can last from a few days to several weeks.

For about a week after your retreat, plan only usual things: job, school, family. This most quickly returns you to functional stability, minimizes exposure to disturbance, and maximizes your chance of absorbing the value of the retreat. Stay in when you might go out. The party will still be there in a week. Be subdued. Keep to yourself. Whose life is it anyway?

How the aftermath goes depends on one’s personality. I’m not the stablest oil rig in the Gulf, so it fairly tosses me around. It usually begins with a calm, solid feeling of deep restedness from the retreat. Then a tension builds to a crisis over a few days. I can feel as bad as the worst moments of my retreat. Then an insight or discovery comes that shows the way to the next period of my life.

This insight is often accompanied by the return of will and focus. Suddenly, I know exactly what to do, how to do it, and have the energy and strength to make it happen. It’s very fun, especially after months of listlessness.

I know less about this part of my clients’ retreats than the dark part. From what I saw and heard, their aftermaths varied greatly in character. Sometimes they matched the drama of mine, sometimes they were smooth sailing. Remember where you just were and keep your eyes peeled.

recapacitation

Regarding some aspects of our own lives, we all know better. I mean things we should do for ourselves which, strangely, we do not. Moralism says it is because we will not. Hygiene says it is because we cannot. Darkroom retreating enables the organism to restore one’s capacity for the benefits of taking care of oneself, therefore restoring the ability to do so. This is recapacitation. The intensity and highs of a retreat mostly fade, but restored capacity remains. Just as a broken leg, once healed, doesn’t become broken again without another major injury.

Thus the full application of the idea behind hygienic darkroom retreating means

  • doing retreats of increasing length
  • alternated with periods of radical lifeway change

until health is fully restored. “Health through healthful living.”

You already know some changes you would like to make. Those you do not know, you can, in darkness, become capable of learning and applying. Resources and opportunities that have been right under your nose all along suddenly become visible and interesting. Having restored a lost part of yourself, how you are changes. So you attract and seek different things. When you see you can walk through the front door of a bakery and get whatever you like, you will stop begging crumbs out its back door.

summary

I have tried to impress you with the idea that you are not the main actor in darkness. But in truth, a part of you is. It is the part we are taught to ignore, deny, and disown: the autonomic self. In darkness, the conscious self we are taught to fully identify with becomes a servant to the autonomic self. This corrects the conventional relationship, which mistakenly harnesses the unfailing processes of life to the agenda of a crippled will.

In ordinary life, you must arrange certain conditions to live. You must keep your wits about you. You are accountable for your own experience. These basic facts not only remain the same in the darkroom, they become especially clear. In darkness, it is your job to maintain certain conditions of the retreat.

Your non-expert, non-mind-reading, non-therapist supporter (if you have one) will be on the outside helping you do that. She will be maintaining the darkroom, bringing food, perhaps finding your lost shoes. Like any decent person would, she will talk to you for a few minutes if you need. It’s your retreat. If something is not working, say so.

If you would, please write a description of what happened before you finish, while it is fresh in your memory. Revisit it later and share it online if you like. Send me a link. I have found these reports very useful in improving the darkroom, understanding the process, and learning to explain it to people. More writers and readers of reports will help spread darkroom retreating and advance its theory and practice.

4 - prepare

These are a few things that will help you prepare for a retreat: the registration form I have used with clients, the food menu, and a list of things to bring. Whether retreating at home or at a center, I suggest you read it and fill out the questionnaire to help you prepare mentally for the retreat. Likewise, give it to those you ever support retreats for.

register

Register for your retreat here. Follow instructions carefully.

general

  1. Read this book. Quiz later.
  2. Select dates for your retreat from the calendar below. Retreats begin at 18:00 and end at 12:00 four or eight mornings later. For example, a 4-day retreat that begins on Monday evening would end on Friday morning.
  3. Respond by email to the questionnaire below. Responses of one or two sentences per question are sufficient.
  4. Send deposit by Bitcoin, PayPal, credit card
  5. Bring things listed below that.

terms

  • Price: (European example)€40 + €80/day (eg, 4-day retreat=€360)
  • Discounts:
    • Local, student, or friend: 25%
    • Local and student or friend: 50%
    • Offers of 35% + remainder in trade gladly considered
    • No one serious turned away for lack of funds
  • Reserve dates with a 50% deposit. Balance due on arrival.
  • Cancelation fees (% of total price):
    • 30+ days before retreat: 5%
    • 7+ days before retreat: 25% (half the deposit)
    • 1-29 days if someone else can take your spot: 10%

 

[google calendar here]

 

questionnaire

  1. Name:
  2. Email address:
  3. Phone:
  4. Address:
  5. Age:
  6. Emergency contact name, email, and phone:
  7. Retreat length:___ days
  8. Retreat starting date____________ +/-___ days (for absolute date, put 0)
    alternate:____________ +/-___ days
  9. How did you first hear about darkroom retreating?
  10. How did you first hear about this darkroom?
  11. Why would you like to retreat?
  12. What will you be doing the week before the retreat? (It should not be especially exhausting or intense for you)
  13. How does the menu sound to you?
  14. Quiz: What heals you in darkness?
  15. Quiz: Where is a good place to put your attention if you feel crazy or tormented?
  16. Would you like to maintain silence during your retreat?
  17. What fears or concerns do you have that might interfere with your retreat? (fear of the dark, claustrophobia, superstition, etc)? How will you handle them? What support might you need?
  18. Assuming I am correct that practically everyone is psychotic how do you feel darkness might significantly affect you, for better or worse?
  19. Is there anything else you would like to add?

menu

Here is the hygienic food plan:

  • pure water on tap
  • frugivorous menu
    • fresh fruit and leafy green vegetables (lettuce, celery, spinach, culinary herbs)
    • whole, raw, ripe, well-washed, and amply provided for eating anytime
    • green salad: sweet or savory, large, properly combined, served at midday
    • not served: juice, oil, spices, salt, onions, garlic, ginger, or ferments (like vinegar).
  • if you would like to know more about this menu before trying it, read the food sections in hygiene and protocol and Dr Douglas Graham’s The 80/10/10 Diet
  • if you somehow cannot eat this way, eat as simply and naturally as you know how. For suggestions, write me with your limitations.

things to bring

  • Yes:
    • bedsheets and pillow (if retreating at a center and need these provided, let supporter know ahead of time)
    • pajamas and loose clothes
    • sweater
    • slippers
    • water bottles, 3-4L worth
    • clock (unlit analog or red LCD)
    • cellphone
    • red LED light
    • materials and tools for plugging any light leaks you discover during your retreat
      • black electrical tape, 1 roll
      • black polar fleece, 50cm x 20cm
      • scissors
      • table knife
      • bamboo skewer
    • toiletries and personal items
    • prescription medication
  • No:
    • cigarettes
    • electronic devices that make sound, light, vibration, or smell: computers, audio players, watches, clocks, vaporizers, oils, massage devices, etc
    • If you must bring any of these things, unless critical for your health, turn them off and store them during the retreat or ask to store them with your supporter.
    • contraband, psychedelics, alcohol: disallowed on the premises
  • Optional
    • special food (please tell supporter about it)
    • simple exercise equipment for body-weight exercise, eg, yoga mat or push-up handle bars. No free weights or elastic or bowed equipment.

5 - design

These are my specifications for a hygienic darkroom. As hygiene uses only normal conditions, a darkroom is merely what all shelter should be but usually is not: easily darkened. As well as warm, well-ventilated, secure, comfortably furnished and sized, and tranquil.

With the advent of street lamps and large, unshuttered windows, darkening bedrooms has become critical. Everyone’s bedroom should be a darkroom, at least for nightly sleep. It is normal, just rare… for now.

How is darkness normal for sleep and healing? The original human habitat is tropical forest, whose dense canopy makes the forest floor perfectly dark at night. While we can sleep in light if necessary, no biological adaptation to it has occurred, only vital accommodation at the expense of overall function. Then, at any time we can have darkness by covering eyes with hands. We do this reflexively when traumatized as well as seek solitude and shelter.

So start in your own bedroom. You already know you can sleep there, what problems need mitigation, how things work, etc. You already paid for it and you need access to darkness every night. If it is truly not worth darkening or unsuitable for short retreats, it is unsuitable for living. Make arrangements to move.

In the meantime, if you wish to darken another room, sleep there three nights beforehand. See if anything about it might disturb you which you cannot practically change: noise, odors or poor ventilation, atmosphere. Mind your senses, feelings, and state of mind. Will you be comfortable there? Will darkening and ventilating it be a reasonable effort? If so, great. If not, conserve your initiative and keep looking for a new home.

There are private and public darkrooms.

A private darkroom is built to basic specifications in your bedroom. It is for nightly use and short retreats up to 8 days. Basic specifications are: ample ventilation, perfect darkness, security, comfort, reasonably quiet, plus any in the list below that you can manage. See private comments for clarification. For budget building tips, see format and make chapters or write me after reading them.

A public dedicated darkroom is built to full specifications below in a small house in a quiet location. It is for all kinds of people for retreats of any length, mostly medium (up to two months) and long (up to a year). It requires all the specifications below except ideal ones. The house should be fully functional to begin with. This means it has automated heating, mechanical ventilation, running hot water, and electricity.

All my retreats have succeeded or failed primarily because of how well the darkroom itself worked. Do not tolerate stale air, frequent or extended noise, light leaks, dangers, discomforts, poor food, etc. At some point, stress becomes distress and destroys a retreat. Handle whatever possible problem crosses your mind rather than thinking you can endure it. Listen to your body and soul.

You should be able to turn off the light and let go of external concerns as much as you can materially arrange to. The stress of healing is enough to bear. A retreat is not an imposition. You naturally want to do it because you are rationally convinced it is good. Nor is it for disciplines or practices, but rest and recuperation. It is not effort, but relief; not penance or strife, but sanctuary from the punishment and strife of our lifeway.

Success of a retreat depends on several factors including facility, attitude, preparation, protocol, and support. The facility is the biggest piece of the puzzle. Good design builds many conditions of success into the room, making retreats practically foolproof. The better the darkroom, the more effective your retreat will be. There is no penalty for doing things correctly.

That said, maybe you cannot, for whatever reason, do everything correctly. But certainly, you will do your best, which you can improve upon later. If we could already do everything correctly, we would probably have no need of darkroom retreating. Just be honest with yourself. This is a real chance to stop suffering quite so much. This principle applies to everything in this list.

I welcome everyone’s improvements to these specifications judged by the objective standards of reason, good (life-supporting) design, and hygiene.

facility

  • building
    • secure
      • safe location
      • keys only with retreatant and supporter
      • supporter on call 24/7 with cellphone, intercom, or bell
    • quiet
      • on a quiet street
      • away from machines
      • sound-insulated
      • silent machines inside (hum and harmonic-free)
      • private: quiet enough for your comfort, perhaps with some use of earplugs
    • solitude
      • separate, small, unoccupied building (see noise section below)
      • inner door has closable, lightproof vent for speaking to supporter
      • private: be alone in the darkroom and, if possible, the apartment or house
      • for long retreats: small and round (see roundness section below):
        • 3-6m inside diameter, 8-28m2
        • minimum wall height: 195cm
        • ceiling peak: 240+cm
    • electromagnetically neutral
      • natural materials: earth, plants, stone (no metal structure)
      • earthed wiring (important in unearthed Sweden and Albania)
      • single outlet where power enters room or building, opposite bed
      • earthing bedsheet
      • private: unplug and turn off as much electricity in and around the room as possible at the breaker, switch, and appliance. For example, if a heater is needed, turn off power to the darkroom and run an extension cord from another room. This gets power out of the walls and brings it into the room at only one point, away from the bed.
  • interior
    • dark
      • not a haze, glimmer, or pinprick of light anywhere
      • easily darkened windows
      • lightlock
        • lightproof double doors
        • space between them for a person and food deliveries
        • for communication, a lightproof vent in inner door, small and closable
      • lightproof bag for cellphone. It can have a red window made of the translucent plastic used in stage lighting
      • candles and lighter
      • private: perfectly dark room and, where necessary, perfectly dark blindfold for going to bathroom, kitchen, and letting in supporter
    • well-ventilated
      • in cold climates, a Heat Recovery Ventilator, either with fiwihex core (Fresh-R) or Mitsubishi Lossnay core, eg Renewaire)
      • airflow: passive or from truly silent fans (large, low RPM)
      • manually adjustable airflow (possibly with smart controls)
      • private: somehow, get plenty of fresh air into the room without cold drafts.
    • warm
      • super-insulated to Passive House standards to eliminate heating if possible
      • otherwise:
        • thermostat inside room
        • fueling outside room
        • non-electric heat if possible
        • otherwise, low-intensity, centralized, EM-shielded electric heat
      • private: somehow, be comfortable in and out of bed.
    • restful
      • bed
        • double or long single size
        • mattress: layers of new foam padding, flame-retardant free, of varying firmness for adjustable softness, aired out regularly
        • polyester/non-toxic mattress cover
        • polyester/non-toxic-fill comforters
        • polyester/non-toxic-fill pillow
        • 100% natural fiber sheet and duvet
      • sofa
      • chairs
      • hammock
      • inversion swing
      • rugs
      • hard, warm floor
      • dining table and chair
      • private: at least a bed, rug, padded chair, and table
    • bathroom
      • existing bathroom
      • or portable fixtures in make chapter:
        • composting toilet
        • tub with shower
        • sink
        • greywater drainage
      • private: For 8-day retreats and longer, a darkened bathroom is necessary. Walking to it outside the darkroom is fine with a blindfold, dark cloths, and extra curtains on windows. Bathing is as important for emotional and intellectual reasons as physical ones. But for a 4-day retreat, a bathroom is not critical. Minimum requirements in primitive conditions is a blindfold, bottled water (for both washing and drinking), a washcloth or sponge for a sponge bath, a towel, and a composting (bucket) toilet.
    • cold food storage
      • silent (unmotorized or isolated)
      • unmotorized uses cold from the ground, block ice, ventilation, or electronic circuit
      • private: cooler with block ice or blindfold to get to refrigerator in kitchen
    • safe: no unpadded or uncovered protrusions, sharp corners, or edges
    • shelf for personal storage
    • space for simple exercise

quiet

Others inevitably make noise. Even if not, you will know someone is there, able to hear you. Like me, you may need to scream and cry. For now, it’s nobody else’s problem or business. The process is strictly for oneself. It minimizes this ordinary influence of and consideration for others. Contact with people during a retreat should be brief and intentional, not incidental.

A clear exception is if you are a parent of a child who still needs your presence. The child can be with you in darkness as long as you both like. I have never facilitated such a retreat, but I definitely would. Nothing is more important to sanity, happiness, and avoidance of retraumatization of new generations than filial attachment.

The weirdest thing that happened to me with regards to noise from other people was in an apartment buiding in December 2011. I kept waking up exhausted from hundreds of short, meaningless dreams. After days of this, I realized in a fury that I was dreaming the mind chatter of others in the building. I stopped the retreat. I’m distinctly non-“psychic”; this never happened to me before. But I am a canary in a coalmine. When something goes wrong, I notice.

Yet two years later, in December, 2013, I successfully retreated in another apartment building. I believe this was due to two factors: my being less fragile than before; and the strong, benevolent psychic presence of my sympathetic, wise older host, who stayed in the apartment like a guardian while I retreated.

As always, I had the darkroom to myself. I had tested my comfort in the apartment beforehand, finding I could sleep and dream easily enough. During my retreat, I could feel others’ presence in the building, but their thoughts did not invade my dreams like before. I got the deep rest I needed. I would not have done a long retreat there, but the short one I did saved my life (for the third time), bought me two months to work on this book, and revealed an accessible setting for short retreats.

The worst noise comes from the relentless grinding of machines: stereos, traffic, ventilation and refrigeration equipment on buildings, and construction. Fine at first, it quickly becomes intolerable, like a drill to the skull. Then, the larger the building and the more electrical wiring and steel framing and reinforcement it has, the more it disturbs electromagnetically. Finally, there is high frequency wireless radiation, that planet-size microwave oven we now live inside of. Fortunately, it exponentially decreases in intensity with distance from the source. At least you can turn off all wireless devices under your power. Long term, you can move or install shielding.

One can become so vulnerable in profound rest that the wrong setting can become harmful. Make sure you feel comfortable in a large or occupied building and confident you will be ok when retreating there. If the influence of the building undermines the restfulness of the retreat too much, stop the retreat and try again elsewhere. Make extra preparations to doubly protect yourself from distress on your transition days: no shopping, visitors, media, or travel. Following my weird retreat in 2011, I was not thinking straight. I moved to an even less restful location a day after exiting the darkroom. This proved even more harmful than the poor location. Post-retreat planning is critical. See protocol/post-retreat).

round

Note: consider this subject in the long term, both for shelter and for long retreats. It is not immediately important in practice.

An experiment: go into a round building and observe how you feel. Compare it to how you feel in square ones.

Born to designers and craftspeople, I’ve done this since childhood. Here are my conclusions.

Round buildings feel sheltering. They shield occupants from subtle energy, physical and psychical. Energy flows around or through them because their roundness does not resist or trap it. Small round spaces feel cozy, not suffocating. One can easily relax inside. One has just what one needs.

Human consciousness expects roundness in its environment. Nature is a symphony of curves: circles, ellipses, parabolas, catenaries, cones, and spheres. Curvature arises from and give rise to innumerable straight-edged shapes at visible and microscopic scales: mostly triangles, pentagons, and hexagons; tetrahedrons, octahedrons, dodecahedrons and icosahedrons; and their stellations and combinations. As Buckminster Fuller demonstrated in his Synergetics (see A Fuller Explanation, nature’s coordinate system is tetrahedronal, not cubic (Cartesian). Four-dimensional, not three.

A square building feels imprisoning. By nature, the right angle stops movement: of energy, people, and things. This stagnation saps and poisons occupants over the long term. Even turning at right angles while walking is miltaristic and jarring. We compensate by making square (also rectilinear or orthogonal) buildings larger than necessary to push corners away. We soften and round them out by filling them with stuff. Ever dissatisfied, we remodel. When that fails, we move, perhaps destroying a family or business in the process. Eventually, the only thing to do about such a toxic building is demolish it, or unconsciously arrange for it to burn down or even get bombed.

Due to gravity, single right angles of linear structures, like trees and stalactites, abound in nature. But not squares and cubes. Squares are inherently weak and inefficient. They collapse without diagonal support (triangulation) and require more edge for the same amount of area as circles. They mate poorly with the curved universe. A few minerals have cubic crystals, like salt. Not much else.

Orthogonal construction breeds decadence, disease, and violence. Rectalinearity is the geometry of slavery: Romans built on grids because they are easily policed. It is a military-economic strategy widely copied to the current day. Observing the demoralizing effect of log cabins on his people on reservations, the American Indian, Black Elk, said, “It is a bad way to live, for there can be no power in a square.”

How tiresome to find we live in voluntary prisons. What is to be done?

The problem solves itself. We simply turn our prisons into escape vehicles. After all, we do need to stop. We are sick. We are slaves. We need to rest, to recover ourselves, to reset our relationship to the world. Conscious of the influence of these boxes, these cells, we can turn it to our advantage. We can use it to stop. But not halfway, like beasts pacing restlessly in a cage. But fully, more than anyone expected, without concession to the demand to constantly be busy. We can even say this is what our buildings were always for. We just never realized it.

So rectilinear buildings are not just fine, but perfectly suitable for short retreats. For medium-length retreats, they should be remedied by an art of placement: feng shui, vastuveda, wabi sabi, or ordo. Long-term (more than five years) and for long retreats, they should be replaced, vacated, and dismantled, their materials burned, buried, or purified through re-use in round buildings.

A good building for the long-term is curved, round, or has five or more sides of equal length joined at equal angles. Rectangular walls are fine. So are right angles where floors meets walls. But not where walls meet ceilings or each other, as in orthogonal floor plans.

Happily, a handful of elegant, cheap, quick round shelter designs are available for new buildings. It turns out that orthogonal construction is not simpler or easier. It’s merely a frame of mind.

~~

Now, let’s learn to actually make escape vehicles out of prison cells. The next chapter gives detailed instructions and computer-drawn plans for your very own darkroom.

6 - make

Use the following plans and instructions to make essential components of a darkroom: ventilation, blinds, and plumbing. I provide designs for both grid-tied and off-grid locations. For those who would like to alter components or redesign them from scratch, design constraints accompany each one, describing its functions, qualities, and performance requirements.

If you need more specific advice for darkening your space, I am available for design consultation. You may use these designs and my consultation to darken other people’s spaces as a service for money. If this works for you and you would like a fun way to reciprocate towards me, please see about/license.

This chapter is the most concrete of all, the logical practice of the abstract theory in the long first chapter, hygiene. It deals with physiological absolutes that confront everyone. Everyone needs an average of 10 hours of darkness a day in order to sleep properly. In our spotlit world, there’s only one way to get it. You must take control of the huge lights commonly built into your walls that turn on and off by themselves, at varying intensities and at all hours, right where and when you need to sleep. Of course, I’m speaking of windows. And you must compensate for the missing ventilation systems for which windows make such poor substitutes.

A darkroom is a real thing you see and touch, use, and show to others. It is normal, not special. It is not a metaphor or a mental process. It must be built and used to gain 99% of the value of this book. It takes imagination, measurement, design, plans, materials, construction, testing, and improvement. These are normal human activities, which everyone can do. They are just slowed down and intensified for a specific purpose. As engineer and grandelder, Jack Nuckols, once told me when my time came, “Become a craftsman.”

Perhaps now is your time. Here we go.

basics

Apply the metric system and these tools, plans, and fabrication instructions to all components or as indicated. Each component has special instructions and design constraints in its own section afterward.

metric

All measurements given in metric, mostly millimeters. Are you used to inches, pounds, and gallons? Get a handle on the brain-descrambling metric system in a split-minute:

  1. understand you will simply be counting to 10 and multiplying by 10 as normal, not wrestling with fractions and several conversion factors
    • basic metric conversions:
      • length: 1m=100cm=1000mm (meter, centimeter, millimeter)
      • volume: 1L=10dL=1000mL (liter, deciliter, milliliter)
      • mass: 1kg=10hg=1000g (kilogram, hectagram, gram. Mass is like weight. But it uses a balance, not a spring scale, so it does not depend on Earth’s gravity.)
    • cool intra-conversions:
      • 1L=10cm x 10cm x 10cm (1000cm3)
      • 1L water=1kg
      • thus, 1mL=1cm3 water=1g
  2. use these imperial near-equivalents to visualize my descriptions and make estimations:
    • 25mm = 1 inch
    • 100mm = 4 inches
    • 1kg = 2 pounds
    • 4L = 1 gallon
    • more at chapter’s end
  3. use the other edge of the ruler

tools

Making components require some or all of these tools:

  1. table or desk to work at
  2. measure
    1. Note: before purchase, test tools for accuracy, which can vary between identical tools, even of good brands. Instructions below.
    2. metric ruler, 30cm, clear plastic. If reproducing plans by hand rather than printing them, then get an Incra ruler. For its effortless marking precision, I recommend it for making anything at all ever. It’s the greatest hand tool I have ever used.
    3. meter stick, steel with engraved marks
      1. put marked edges of two sticks together so 40cm mark of one meets 60cm mark of other
      2. push ends of both against a wall and check how well marks line up
      3. repeat with other sticks till you find a match
      4. buy one of them
    4. metric measuring tape, 3m or more
      1. use a tape whose case length is easily and accurately added to the figure on the tape itself. Some measuring tapes are designed to give highly accurate internal measurements (eg, between sills)
      2. hook tape on end of meter stick and compare marks (external measurement)
      3. push end of meter stick against a wall, put tape on top of meter stick, and compare marks (internal measurement)
      4. repeat steps 2-3 with other tape measure
  3. mark
    1. 0.5mm mechanical pencil
    2. ballpoint pen, black or blue ink
    3. black marker
    4. straight pin with colored plastic head or masking tape handle
    5. magnifying glass (even a tiny plastic one works, like the one in a Swiss Army knife)
  4. cut, score, crease
    1. straight edge 200mm longer than your longest piece will be. 1-2mm-thick steel is best. An aluminum door or window frame member also works well. A board less than 12mm thick with a perfectly straight edge (check it!) is fine.
    2. razor knife with new blade
    3. table knife
    4. scissors for both paper and fabric
  5. join
    1. masking tape
    2. wood glue, unthickened, any grade
    3. glue syringe, 20-50mL for precise, efficient gluing
      • available at:
        • woodworking shops, with needles
        • as kitchenware along with 2-3mm stainless needles
        • pharmacies. Also get a 2mm x 40–50mm needle. Perhaps cut off the tip. If unavailable, use a cartridge from ballpoint pen, the fat (4-5mm) tapering type. Clean it out and trim it down to point in taper that fits over nipple of syringe
      • remove needle and plunger. Cover nipple with finger and fill from back, leaving 10mm unfilled. Replace plunger barely. Point nipple upward and uncover it. Wait for air bubble to rise to top. Then push plunger in till air is cleared from syringe. Replace needle and use.
  6. for roller blind:
    1. drill
    2. screwdriver
    3. gluing clamp (for roller blind)
      • 2 straight, flat 35 x 90 boards, non-rounded edges
      • 1.5x as long as long edge of paper sheets
      • every 300mm, 8mm holes, an 8x80mm bolt, 2 washers, and a wingnut holding boards together
    4. hack saw (for roller blind), even just a hack saw blade is enough. Cover teeth at one end with tape as a handle so you can cut on the pull stroke

plans

I have drawn the plans on a computer for precision, clarity, and ease of modification. They can be baffling to look at at first. Use the key to understand the symbols and marks. Compare drawings to photos. Then simply follow the instructions, one step at a time, and you ought to end up with the intended component. If this does not work, write me and I’ll try to sort out the confusion I’ve caused you and maybe improve the instructions and drawings for others, too.

A drawing has one or two views, depending on the best way to communicate its information:

  • plan: from above, two dimensional (2D). Default view if unlabeled.
  • elevation: from the side (2D)
  • section: a cutaway or slice of the object showing all parts when assembled (2D)
  • perspective: from non-right-angled point of view to capture more sides (3D)
  • exploded: all parts separated but in correct order and linear relation (3D)

For example, the helix vent has plan views of its flat parts and one section view showing how parts are assembled. The toilet frame has both plan and elevation views, while the shower has an exploded view.

All plans can be reused except sleeping mask plan, which is destroyed as you make it. So make as many prints of it as masks you intend to make. Images below are only for reference and hand-reproduction. They are reduced to fit book pages. Thus they are neither full-scale nor in proportion to each other. If reading on a screen while online, you can zoom in; click each image to open the corresponding full-size plan as an individual PDF; or:

  1. download all plans at once with the darkroom retreat zip file. Extract (decompress) the file. In the make folder, find:
    • a complete set of PDF plans
    • all photos below plus extras from website
    • SVG source files of plans for modifying them (originally drawn in Inkscape
    • I would love it if someone made - 3D versions of these drawings with Sketchup - assembly instructions for the components like IKEA
  2. print
    1. large format
      1. large format printing is cheap, extremely accurate, and much faster and easier than desktop printing. Most print shops, including Staples and Office Depot, now offer large format printing.
      2. email your files to print shop or take them on a usb flash drive
      3. paper
        1. specify cheapest option
        2. if print shop has 300gsm acid-free black paper on a roll for large format printing, print the helix vent’s channels and walls directly onto it. Yes, black ink on black paper is visible enough to work with.
      4. have files printed actual size, with no scaling. Before paying, check measurements with ruler or measuring tape. Distortion should not exceed 1mm over a 250mm span.

        After resigning myself to 2mm distortion per 250mm with desktop printers, I was shocked to find no distortion with large format printing. But then it made sense because architects, engineers, and builders depend on this service for their blueprints.

    2. desktop
      1. only do this if you are absolutely broke or can’t find a large format printing service on your desert island. Desktop printing of plans takes a lot of time and yields imperfect results.
      2. print
        1. open file with Adobe Reader (not Adobe Professional)
        2. in print dialogue, select: “Poster”; Tile Scale: 100%; Overlap: 1.0in; Cut marks: yes; Labels: yes
        3. use A4, letter, or legal size, possibly A3
        4. Distortion over 250mm span should not exceed 1mm.
        5. after printing one file, check measurements against ruler to 1mm tolerance.
      3. join sheets
        1. cut a small wedge out of overlapping cut mark to align it with matching cut mark on sheet below
        2. align cut marks at perimeter of plan first, then the one(s) in the middle.
        3. use masking tape to join sheets
    3. hand-reproducing plans from book or screen
      1. to keep drawing orthogonal, use some combination of graph paper, drafting table, and extra careful measurement and marking. An Incra ruler will help a lot with this. See basics/tools
      2. plans are as symmetrical and uniform as possible. If two similar-looking areas of a plan look the same size, they are. So from measurements given in plans, infer the rest. There is some redundancy so you don’t have to figure out everything and can double-check essential measurements.
      3. use grey-numbered cumulative measurements in plan to quickly mark lines
  3. key

    Here is a key to the computer-drafted plans. Further explanation of symbols in fabricate section below.

plan key

fabricate

These instructions apply to all components, or as indicated. Read special instructions for each component in its respective section afterward.

  1. prepare plans
    1. for fabric parts (sleeping mask, helix vent gasket, roller blind seals)
      1. using ruler and razor knife, cut out parts at outlines (except roller blind seals: cut around group of 8 seals)
      2. cut out tape holes on dash-dotted lines
      3. skip to step “3. make parts” (about two pages below)
    2. customize roller blind plans
      1. cut out parts, leaving as much paper around them as possible
      2. measure variables (h, w, t) and derive measurements for parts. Write measurements on parts next to variables.
      3. cut lines running through stretch arrows
    3. customize threshold vent
      1. using straight edge and razor knife, cut vertical lines running through shrink arrows in grey areas
      2. shrink left and right sections (push them inward, overlapping center section) until cut edges match center section’s top and bottom mm marks equal to h
      3. draw vertical lines through mm marks in corners of plan equal to h
      4. cut horizontal line running through center shrink arrow
      5. shrink top and bottom sections until cut edges match center section’s left and right mm marks equal to t
      6. adjust point C (at both left and right):
        • downwardly so its distance from point D equals t/2
        • horizontally so it lies on new vertical line
      7. cut vertical line running through center stretch arrow
  2. transfer plans to material
    1. tape plans to materials
      1. helix vent shell: align plan diagonally to corrugations (or edges or folds) of cardboard
      2. where necessary, cut small wedges into outlines of plans to align them with edges of materials. With some roller blind frame parts, dash-dotted extensions of outlines aid in this step.
      3. parts with stretch arrows
        1. tape one half to edge of material
        2. using derived measurements and tape measure, mark material where opposite edge of part should be and tape it there
      4. lay out other plans on materials and tape opposite corners
    2. put 3 layers (10mm+) of scrap cardboard on work surface
    3. transfer plan to material
      • poke straight pin through centers of all lines close to ends as well as centers of holes
      • use magnifying glass for marking ease and geeky precision thrills
    4. remove plan from material
    5. mark holes in material with pen
      • circle holes from dashed lines
      • draw triangles around holes from dotted lines
      • add asterisk to circle or triangle where indicated
      • draw squares around holes from solid lines
      • draw short lines from circles, triangles, and squares in the same direction as lines in plan
      • double-circle holes for holes
      • copy joint labels
  3. make parts:
    1. keep scrap cardboard on work surface
    2. fabric parts only (sleeping mask, helix vent gaskets, roller blind seals)
      1. tape plans to fleece over tape holes
      2. roller blind locking seals: cut 8mm slits through plan with razor knife
      3. cut parts exactly around plan outline with scissors
      4. leave plans taped to sleeping mask side seals
      5. remove plans from other parts
      6. repeat steps 1-4 to make
        • 2 sleeping mask center seals
        • 4 sleeping mask covers. For the 4th cover, use optional cotton fabric, add 20mm on side for seam allowance, and leave plan taped to fabric
        • 2 helix vent gaskets
        • 4 roller blind locking seals
      7. skip remaining steps 2-4 and resume special instructions
    3. tools: metal straight edge, table knife, razor knife
    4. between pairs of:
      • triangled holes in shell
        • make sure holes go all the way through the cardboard to back side
        • turn cardboard over and lightly crease its back side with back of table knife tip, avoiding breaking the surface of cardboard
        • press sharpest edge of straight edge into crease to deepen it before folding
      • holes with asterisks in paper
        • between pairs of triangled holes, score* front side to fold backwards
        • between pairs of circled holes, score back side to fold forwards
        • *score: to cu t halfway through thickness of material with razor knife so it remains one piece and folds very easily
      • circled and triangled holes in paper
        • between all pairs of holes, crease front side with back tip of table knife
        • fold material at all creases toward yourself
        • then, where crease lies between triangled holes, fold it backward
      • between squared holes, cut with razor knife
    5. widen double-circled holes to diameter indicated in plan
      • use a pointed dowel of appropriate diameter
      • spin it with your fingers or a power drill as you gently push it into hole

Below, before each plan, I give design constraints so you can come up with different ways of solving the design problem. Can you design something that is simpler, faster, cheaper, more effective, more elegant? Fantastic. Please share it (see introduction/open-source).

ventilation

The tricky part of making a darkroom is not darkening it but ventilating it. After all, its windows and doors are sealed! Here is how I do it.

discussion

Below, I will give design constraints and describe various systems of ventilation. But I will first address its physiological importance.

breathe

I have observed a great number of people who seem oblivious to their own need for fresh air. Even though everyone knows we die within minutes without air, the importance of constant fresh air has somehow escaped many. I can only attribute this negligence to mass psychosis, my explanation for other appalling features of civilized life. At the risk of insulting your intelligence, I am bound to address this fact of life, though it be one of the most basic, most obvious ones of all.

Fresh air is always important. It is a normal condition of life and, along with warmth and safety, an urgent necessity. Every second of our lives, pentillions of organic processes occur, and virtually all of them requires oxygen. Just like food, air becomes a part of one’s organism with every breath. This determines quality of life to a very great degree.

Though it weighs little, the amount of air you breathe weighs twice as much as the food you eat. In a darkroom, you have little to do all day besides breathe. So if you haven’t usually paid attention to air quality, you will likely notice it in darkness.

Regardless, poor air quality cancels most benefits of darkness. Intermittently airing the room out does not work. I mean opening the door a couple times a day with eyes covered. Put this approach out of your mind. This is darkness, not the dark ages. Whatever it takes, provide yourself with continuous fresh air in darkness.

This means either: following the instructions below; hiring an HVAC contractor to clean, repair, replace, or install ventilation in your home; moving somewhere the ventilation system just works (like the tropics or a new house in northern Europe); using oxygen producing plants; or some combination of these; it must be done. Forget about darkness. Besides not freezing to death and being out of immediate danger, you have no greater concern in life than arranging to breathe fresh air continuously and comfortably.

constraints
  • provides plenty of fresh air
  • lightproof
  • silent: no hum or harmonics from fan
  • comfortable temperature: no undesired cold drafts
  • economical: ie, no wasted heat to the outdoors. This is more involved and a lower priority than retreating itself, so don’t get stuck on it. It requires a heat recovery ventilator (HRV). Besides significantly lowering heating costs, an HRV improves air quality and comfortability. More about it below.
system

Somehow, fresh air has to get into the darkroom and stale air has to get out. In the terms of the HVAC industry (heating, ventilation, air conditioning), the fresh air vent is the supply and the stale air vent is the return.

Sometimes, supply and return vents exist in the same room. This is the fanciest version of balanced mechanical ventilation. If your place has it, thank your lucky stars. Just make sure it runs continuously.

More commonly, balanced systems put supplies in bedrooms and living rooms, and returns in kitchens and bathrooms. This means air escapes a bedroom around the door. Unless the space outside the door is totally dark, this calls for a threshold lightproof vent (plans below).

Balanced systems are rare. More common are negative pressure systems: bedroom and living room windows act as passive supplies and bathroom and kitchen exhaust fans as active returns. In this case, a lightproof multi-purpose helix vent, built into a window blind, is the supply. And a threshold vent is the return, letting stale air escape the bedroom.

Rooms with totally passive ventilation rely on open windows, exterior vents, and infiltration through cracks (that will get sealed against light). Such rooms will need helix vents in blinds at different heights. Probably a fan and maybe ducting.

By closely observing buildings I have discovered some simple ways to ventilate them. Sometimes rooms have lightproof and sound-dampened holes built into them in unexpected places:

  • unused holes for pipes, wires, chimneys, and ventilation.
  • behind a cupboard or inside a closet
  • a removable panel or piece of trim that could be temporarily replaced with a panel with a hole in it.

For example, I once found a cosmetically damaged door in the garbage at a building supply store exactly the same size as my darkroom’s door. So I stored the original door and cut holes in the damaged door for ventilation.

Another darkroom had no ventilation or suitable holes anywhere. Except it had no door. So we built a frame inside the doorway with a narrow door on one side and a narrower panel on the other. We cut holes in the panel for ventilation. We fixed the frame in the existing doorway with metal straps screwed into old hinge holes. So we left no trace when dismantling the darkroom.

Similarly, we hung 7m of ducting that ran through three rooms; attached a silencer to it; made three window panels; and imperfectly covered five more windows with only one new screw hole in the entire rented house. And that hole was invisible behind a loose piece of trim.

Sewage pipes drain downward but are ventilated upward. Once, friends and I replaced a flush toilet with a composting toilet. The exposed drain pipe, being oversize and in a single-story house, wasn’t subject to backflow. So it proved a perfect exhaust duct for a case fan at floor level. Imagination conquers all obstacles (and renews itself in darkness).

lightproof vents

Here are further design constraints, photos, plans, and instructions for making and installing lightproof vents.

  • constraints (helix vent specifications in parentheses){threshold vent specifications in curly braces}:
    • durable (protective cardboard shell){subject to damage by kicking but easily rebuilt and can be made of sheet metal or shielded with cardboard or thin wooden boards}
    • thin enough to fit between blind and window (80mm) or door and threshold {adjustable}
    • cross-sectional area >75cm2 (90cm2){60–120cm2}
    • short airway (260mm){140mm}
    • minimal size (80 x 265 x 280){fits under door, sticks out 20mm each side and up 60mm}
    • easy to make (so-so){yes}
    • elegant (yes: simple compact form, uses common materials, zig-zag-shaped passage accommodates natural helical movement of air){yes}
    • cheap ($4 in materials, 2-hour assembly time){$2 in materials, 1-hour assembly time}
helix vent

photo: helix vent, complete
photo: helix vent core, exploded

plan: helix vent, assembly
plan: helix vent, channels
plan: helix vent, inner wall
plan: helix vent, outer wall
plan: helix vent, shell

I call it a helix vent because of how air actually moves through it: like a corkscrew. It might look like air would zigzag through like light. But the path of least resistance for air, a fluid like water, is to maintain the same curved trajectory by helixing through. Because the helix is the natural form of fluids in motion under any circumstance, this minimizes friction within the airstream as well.

The helix vent can go anywhere. Flaps of its face opening poke through a 40 x 282mm slot and fold down with tape or glue.

  • window: attach it to the back of a blind and crack the window behind it.
  • door: cut slot(s) in it and use helix vent instead of a threshold vent.
  • wall vent (leading outside or to another room): attach vent to a cardboard box and attach box to the wall over the vent. Vents can be either supply or return vents; air flows either direction through the vent.

If your darkroom’s ventilation is passive, put vents both low and high in room to enable convection. The greater the inside and outside temperature difference; the greater the vertical distance between vents; and the more vents; the better this works. Also, carbon dioxide is heavier than air, so exhaust vents should be as close to the floor as possible.

Do you need a more compact vent or wish to manufacture vents? I prototyped some based on the same helix principle that proved too difficult to make by hand. Write me for photos, plans, and instructions. It is 280H x 180W x 60D (where W is distance through vent). Further reductions are possible (down to W of 65) for compact applications.

Materials are simple and non-toxic: heavy black acid-free paper, cardboard, fabric, and wood glue. Look in art or office supply shops for the paper. North Americans, use this paper weight and size conversion chart. If large sheets are unavailable, glue small sheets together between folds in plan. Wood glue has high tack and quick drying time, easing assembly. School glue will work, too.

Read through instructions once while studying plans.

  1. materials (see plans for quantities)
    1. paper (for channels and walls)
      • black, acid-free bond or coverstock
      • available at art supply and fine stationery and book shops
      • weights (paper weight conversion chart)
        • channel: 120-300gsm
        • wall: 200–400gsm
        • total: 390–600gsm
    2. cardboard, single layer, 3–4.2mm thick (for shell)
    3. fabric, polar fleece, black, medium weight (for gaskets; 10 layers of it in a stack should measure 30-35mm high)
  2. follow instructions in basics section above
  3. sub-assembly
    1. attach channels and gaskets to walls
      1. referring to key, get a clear idea of how parts go together
      2. glue channel and wall joints in alphabetical order
      3. glue gasket inside top and bottom of outer wall
    2. glue joints of shell together with shell seals
  4. assemble core
    1. glue 20mm wide flaps of inner wall to outer wall
    2. glue 20mm wide flaps of outer wall to inner wall
  5. if not using immediately, store core inside shell, covering exposed part of core with scrap piece of cardboard to prevent crushing.
  6. installation
    1. determine vent location in panel
      • edge opening of vent should face window opening
      • vent should not touch window handles, locks, and frame
    2. on panel, mark slot exactly the size of the vent’s face opening, 40mm x 282mm
    3. cut out slot
    4. from the back, position vent core over hole and fit vent flaps through it
    5. lay panel on table, core down and panel up
    6. pulling top flap up snugly, use back of table knife tip to crease the outside of it right where it passes through hole
    7. fold flap at crease and glue or tape it to front of panel
    8. repeat with bottom flap, then with side flaps
    9. attach shell to back of panel over core with tape, glue, or screws going through panel into braces
    10. cover shell with foil and/or white paper to minimize warping by sun
threshold vent

A bedroom door often has a gap at the bottom—the threshold—for ventilation. In mechanically ventilated dwellings, this gap allows air to flow out of the bedroom toward the dwelling’s return vent (or perhaps just a window). The threshold vent lets air out but no light in. Its design adapts to door thickness, the height of the gap between bottom of door and threshold, width of door, and width of vent necessary for sufficient airflow. It works if gap is 15-33mm.

If greater than 33mm, add cardboard or wood to the bottom of the door or build up threshold with boards. Or modify the design. If less than 15mm, you can trim the bottom of the door. Otherwise, or if bottom of door fits into a stepped threshold, this vent will not work. Somehow, air has to get out of the room without letting in light.

Block light that reaches the door from the outside as much as possible. For example, make a removable partition in the hallway, which can also darken the path between darkroom and bathroom.

plan: threshold vent perspective
plan: threshold vent

  1. materials
    • paper, acid-free, 400-600gsm bond or coverstock (empty cereal and frozen pizza boxes work, too)
    • muslin fabric, black
    • fleece fabric, black
  2. follow instructions in basics section
  3. blacken inside of ends (grey area) with marker
  4. cut fabric to cover:
    1. area of bottom of door surrounded by vent + 30mm above each side (180–2_h_ x w)
    2. threshold (t+40 x width of threshold+40)
    3. inside of vent except ends (t+200 x w+5; area between covrners p, q, r, s)
    4. underside of vent + 10mm all the way around (t+60 x w+20)
  5. attach fabric
    • with tape to door and threshold
    • with glue to vent
  6. fold up ends to make a box-like structure, as in threshold perspective drawing
  7. tape flaps to outside of vent body (this can be undone later to store vent flat)
  8. tape vent to door at the triangular flaps
  9. fill in gaps on each side of vent with fleece baffle, as in drawing. Fleece measurement formula: 20+2h+t/2 x width of gap+10. Use 2 layers. Horizontal edge of fleece should be 10mm above bottom of door. If it drags out of position, weight it with a stick inside, half the thickness of the door. It is 5mm extra wide on each side to seal against the vent and the door jam. Cut away any fleece that interferes with door seal (see below).

machines

fan

I recommend a fan of 200–500mm and less than 800 RPM. Add a regulator to an AC extraction fan to control speed. A 12V DC case fan (also known as a squirrel cage fan) of 360mm and 600 RPM is available. Some 120-140mm case fans claim very low noise (9dB). Power a DC case fan with an AC/DC universal adapter with variable voltage for speed control ($5 at variety stores).

Small fans have little hum to start with, but they run at high speed, so they develop a hum and harmonics. Bigger fans start with more of a hum but they run more slowly for the same air output, so they develop less noise overall. So you can more easily silence them and retreat longer without irritation.

In more than one darkroom, I had no power. A 12V DC case fan + batteries made a quick and dirty solution. 120mm is noisy but it’s the most common size fan. It’s salvageable from an old desktop computer tower, $1 at thrift stores or flea markets, or new for $2–20 at a computer or electronics store. Combined with a silencer, which you need anyway, it may be fine. More testing of this is needed.

Use AA alkaline batteries. For one night, you will only need 4-8, depending on how fast you want the fan. Tape them together in series, positive end of one to negative end of the next, with one fan wire at each end of the series. No fan movement? Switch the +/– poles on the adaptor or switch the positive and negative wires.

Changing the batteries every day quickly gets to be a pain. I got a proper solar power system for less than $100:

  • solar panel: 12V. Size depends on location: 10W in Guatemala, 40W in rainy Oregon winter. ($10–$100 on eBay)
  • charge controller: 12V, 4 or 6-pole ($35 on eBay)
  • battery: 12V 7A, lead acid ($30 at a motorcycle shop)
  • wire, 20 AWG, enough to connect everything ($0–10 from a dumpster, yard sale, or hardware store).

Once built, maintain by wiping dust off panel once a week.

noise

Noise is another form of pollution a darkroom must provide shelter from. Noise comes from outside from machines, traffic—including big boats and airplanes—construction, music, fireworks, and talking and playing people. It comes from inside from other people in adjoining spaces, machines—refrigerators, ventilation, water flow—music, people. At some point, it becomes too much for a retreat to work. It must be attenuated somehow or departed from to another location.

The four principles of soundproofing are clear and widely understood:

  1. mass: heavy materials absorb low frequency (bass) sounds
  2. absorption: fine fibers absorb high frequencies and prevent echoing in air cavities
  3. dampening: using rubbery material to dampen vibration in resonant materials like metal, wood, masonry, glass
  4. decoupling: disconnect structures and airspaces to prevent transmission of sound vibration from source to receiver

Some companies offer tutorials on all soundproofing basics and some details.

For now, I will continue with ventilation noise, the solution to which solves most other noise issues.

Even the quietest fan makes noise because of the friction of air itself against the fan blades, housing, ducting, and vent. I used to think it was the hum or harmonics of the motor and I could silence it with enough padding. Not so. Because of air friction, fully silencing the ventilation system requires a silencer of some type.

The silencer principle: volumetric expansion of ducting causes airstream depressurization. This transforms low frequencies into high ones, which are absorbable by fine fibers lining the silencer. This is how a gun silencer works, too.

You can buy duct silencers from manufacturers. Here is a simple design for a DIY duct silencer. Or use a tube made of acoustic ducting, at least 3m with 2-3 bends. Or use a silencer for sound booths. With enough bends, this may eliminate the need for a lightproof vent.

Put ducting outside within a square tube made of dense material like wood to stop low-frequency noise from outside the building. Point the fan out at the end to suck air out from the building.

I finally got to prototype a silencer this out in fall, 2016. It was simpler and worked much better than I expected. A coming project is to design a compact silencer to work with fans and lightproof vents. Thanks to Richard Nöjd of Skattungbyn, Sweden, for finding this cool solution. They are industry standards, making buildings quiet worldwide.

heat recovery ventilator

If you live in a cold place, I highly recommend buying and installing a Heat Recovery Ventilator (HRV). It conducts heat from return air to supply air while keeping airstreams separate.

Fine wire heat exchange (fiwihex) technology is my favorite. It is 15x more efficient than conventional plate exchangers. Fiwihex cores have been available for $150 from Viking House and Vision4Energy and possibly vaventis. These companies’ Breathing Windows embody an intriguing design for a complete ventilation system. But I lived with one for six months and found it too loud due to its small fans with integrated motors. Thus my thinking about silent fans (more below).

The most interesting plate exchangers use the Mitsubishi Lossnay core, found in Energy Recovery Ventilators such as Renewaire’s. Made of high-tech paper, the Lossnay recovers heated water vapor as well as heat from air. Lossnay’s principle has DIY-potential, using 25m2 of non-siliconized parchment paper (“sandwich paper” in supermarkets). I have conceived a design for it. Please write me for details.

A recovery ventilator requires two fans. The trouble with case fans is that they are axial fans. These do not efficiently generate pressure to overcome resistance in ventilation systems (long pipes, heat exchanging cores, filters). But centrifugal fans can.

It would be nice to have a truly silent fan for this. I have conceived a design for a 700–900mm, low-RPM homemade centrifugal fan, powered from outside the airstream by a motor in a separate, soundproofed case. The fan’s metal or plastic parts would be lasercut according to an open-source, electronic plan file. Please write me for details of concept.

darkness

There is darkness, and then there is darkness. We’re going for the second kind: perfect and absolute. Because there is a thousand-percent difference between 99.99% and 100% dark. Then the mind has nothing left to hold onto, no reason to resist. Finally it can let go and fall into the well of itself.

Though it remains easier to deal with than ventilation, light is relentless. It sneaks sideways through a single layer of clear plastic tape, through heavy fabric, around multiple, darkened corners, and at joints and edges of everything. So I have developed equally formidable means of eliminating it.

Generally, to darken a space,

  1. use dense inherently lightproof sheet material in 1-2 layers to cover area
  2. use soft black fabric or black adhesive tape to seal edges
  3. outer surfaces exposed to sun should be reflective: white or silver
  4. in vents, channel light around several dark-surfaced corners

Usually, using fewer layers means:

  • easier, more reliable operation
  • better function
  • neater appearance
  • greater need for precision in design and construction

If improvising: use many layers. With each layer, block as much light as close to the source as possible. First, block 99% the light. Then 99% of what’s left. Then the last 0.01% is easier to address. Close any curtains In rooms or hallways outside a darkroom’s door. Where possible, prevent direct sunlight from hitting darkening measures.

Edges are tricky. Black polar fleece is the best thing I have found for sealing edges. Its like a sponge for light. It is widely available, cheap, and forgiving. A knit fabric, its edges require no hem. Just cut and attach with school glue or tape.

We will start with the simplest and most portable design, which darkens the small space immediately around the eyes: the sleeping mask.

sleeping mask

plan: sleeping mask

The quickest way to obtain a large measure of darkness wherever you are is to cover your eyes with a good sleeping mask. Along with dark sheets and blankets, this leaves only a bit of skin (with its sleep-interrupting light receptors) on the face exposed to light. It is a cheap, quick, accessible, discreet, and very effective, a first step into the profound rest darkness makes possible.

I have not tried every single mask on the market. But none has satified my requirements. So I designed one.

  • constraints
    • blocks all light
      • through the mask
      • at its edges
    • comfortable for many hours
    • stays in place during sleep and gentle activity
    • cheap and simple to make

Some measurements in the drawing are marked with a tilde (~). This means they are adjustable. I have not developed a fitting system yet. So make one mask according to drawing. Then adapt it according to its comfortability and light-blocking ability on your face. The drawing is of the mask that fits me. I have a not-unusual face for a thin man of mostly Northern European heritage.

  1. materials
    • black polar fleece
    • optional: black cotton or other natural soft smooth fiber (silk, bamboo, tencel, linen, hemp, etc). Use a knit or a weave that is not tight or stiff. If a weave, add a 40mm to width and length as a seam allowance to fold underneath when sewing it to other cover pieces.
    • elastic, 5mm, white
    • cord, 3mm polyester or nylon, white
    • thread
  2. follow basic instructions
  3. attach side seals to cover
    1. put cotton cover with plan still attached on 2-3 layers of cardboard
    2. each side seal has a 7mm wide flap divided by 5mm cut in middle and a small circle on dashed stitch line. Two side seals=4 divisions.
      1. align one division at a time to grey marks on cover
      2. tape in place
      3. sew on stitch line of plan to or from small circle
      4. tear plan in middle to bend seal
      5. repeat for other three divisions
      6. remove all paper from fabric
  4. attach center seals
    1. fold center seals in half the long way and fit them between side seals, making everything symmetrical and even
    2. pin center seals to cover through their folds
    3. sew (maybe hand sew) center seals to cover
  5. bind seals
    1. hand-sew seals together through sideways stichline
    2. pull thread with minimal force, leaving seam neither loose nor tight.
    3. the stitchline is a little distant—7mm—from the zigzagging edges of the seals. This allows the seals to hold each other up to fill in the gaps on each side of the nose. Yet the unbound edges of the seals can fan out to more gently make contact with the face.
  6. sew cover
    1. stack all cover pieces, matching up edges evenly
    2. fold seam allowance of cotton cover under and pin in place to other cover pieces
    3. sew around edge of cover to join all pieces
  7. prepare straps
    1. cut elastic
      • 2 pieces 500mm long
      • 1 piece 250mm long
    2. cut cord, 4 pieces 30mm long
    3. melt all ends with flame to prevent fraying
    4. tie figure-8 knots in ends of elastic
  8. attach straps
    1. fold cord in half, making a loop. Sew loop to front of mask at points x and z so loops stick out over corners from cover 1mm and cord ends are pointed toward center of cover
    2. tie one end of a 500mm piece to a loop at point x with a slip knot
    3. tie other end at other point x with taut line hitch
    4. repeat steps 2 & 3 with other 500mm piece at points y
    5. tie 250mm piece to 500mm pieces at points z with slip knots
    6. the taut line hitch, when tight, slides on the part of the strap it is tied to, then locks in place, creating a strap of adjustable length. Adjust straps for comfort. Bottom strap should go around neck, top strap should go high around back of head.

door seal

plan: door seal section

Black polar fleece makes darkening a door easy and quick. Use tape at first. Tack edge of fleece in position with 10mm pieces of masking tape every 400mm. Then put a continuous strip of tape over the edge. Once you get the hang of it and know where you’d the fleece to stay, use glue where possible (glue removal described below).

  1. sides and top: affix 50-70mm wide strips of black fabric to door jam with masking tape or white school glue. When closing, door should catch middle of fabric, pulling and bending it around one edge of the door and fill the gap between the door and jam.
  2. latch and hinges: cut holes in middle or slits in edges of fleece to accommodate these
  3. bottom: where no threshold vent is necessary, make a fleece baffle the width of the door. See threshold vent perspective drawing for baffle design. It is a half-tube of black fleece fabric that hangs from the bottom of the door and touches the threshold or floor underneath. Tape a 100mm wide strip of black muslin fabric to the threshold or floor under the closed door. Black fabric against black fabric makes a good light seal.
  4. if light still leaks in the sides or top, affix a second strip to door, as in drawing
  5. to remove glued-on fabric, wet it. This will dissolve the glue and the strips will peel off easily after a few minutes. As this happens, use a wet rag to wipe off glue residue before it dries again.

If door has a window, use one of the methods below to cover it.

window

To darken windows, use one of the four methods I have come up with—rollerblind, velcro, plastic, and foil—or have blackout blinds custom made with side rails for 10-100x the money. Or invent something else. Cool.

constraints

  • perfectly darkening
  • quickly and easily operated so it actually gets used
  • good-looking
  • discreet: looks like a blind or curtain from the outside (not a secret cannabis-growing operation)
  • accommodates lightproof vent
  • window or trickle vent can be open behind it
  • holds its shape over time in different temperatures and humidities
  • durable
  • of common, cheap materials
  • reasonably easy to make
  • easily uninstalled
  • leaves few marks or holes

Blackout blind fabric is plastic-coated to seal tiny holes in the weave. Like anything, fabric quality varies greatly. Light still leaks through the surface of some fabric. Here is how to test it.

Use a high-power flashlight too bright to look directly into, like a big Mag-Lite or tactical flashlight. Get a sample of fabric big enough to cover the flashlight’s lens twice. Test the flashlight to make sure it works. Tightly tape one layer of fabric over the lens with lightproof tape, then another. Put it by your bed. Quickly darken your sleeping room as well as possible with blankets, cardboard, foil, etc, and go to sleep. After waking, before looking directly at any light sources, point the flashlight at your eyes and turn it on for a few seconds. You should see no light. Turn off flashlight to prevent burning. If you saw light, the fabric is unacceptable. Remove one layer of fabric. If you now see light, then use two layers of that fabric. If you still see no light, you have found excellent blackout fabric you can use in one layer. Please let me know the brand. Blackout fabric that works perfectly in one layer is rare.

If buying a complete rollerblind, buy from an established local blind shop that cannot easily escape dissatisfied customers. Do not buy on the internet, regardless of price, guarantees, or reviews on (fake) review sites. (Yes, I learned this the hard way). Buy only well-known, internationally distributed brands (which generally cause the least complaints). Get a guarantee of absolute lightproofness of the entire installation. Tell them you will be testing it with high-tech equipment. That is, with human eyes that have had three days to adjust to darkness.

Some fabric has toxic PVC (polyvinyl chloride) coatings. Get full disclosure of material content. The specifications of one product I looked at stretched to three pages. But still, under “coating”, the manufacturer divulged merely one word: “polymer”. This is another word for plastic. This could have meant PVC, so I did not buy it. It’s too bad. Later I found out they use the industry standard, acrylic foam.

Search for PVC-free blackout blinds and blackout fabric. A handful of companies make blinds for traveling (especially with children). Some sell the fabric they use by the meter.

Below, I describe four homemade blind methods: roller, velcro, plastic, and foil. The rollerblind is most recognizable. For ease of fabrication and low cost, it has borders of heavy paper instead of aluminum or wood. It operates easily and looks good. It works with or without a vent. Making it takes patience and precision (difficulty level: 3 out of 5). The velcro blind is easier to make (difficulty: 2), almost as easy to operate, good looking if unconventional, but harder to remove. Plastic cover can be reused, even traveled with. It is the easiest and quickest method. Foil cover is for one-time use, easiest to get materials for, very cheap, a little tricky to make, and its PVC tape is toxic. So only use if really pinched for time, money, or material availability.

If your room’s air supply comes through your window, attach a lightproof vent to blind near the top. Attach it to the outside of the blind if there is space for it. Test position of vent before cutting a slot for it to make sure it clears the window frame and handles. If your supply and return air pass through your window, use two lightproof vents, one near the top and one near the bottom of a blind.

Now for a quick lesson on window types and anatomy:

  • ‘types:
    • fixed
    • opening
      • sliding
        • horizontal
        • double hung (vertical)
      • casement (hinged)
  • anatomy. From center of window to wall:
    1. pane: the glass itself
    2. frame: holds pane
    3. sash: holds frame, which closes against it. Often same as frame in non-opening windows.
    4. sill: holds sash; it’s the surface where you put plants, candles, etc, but also corresponding sides and top
    5. recess: entire opening in wall where window is. Often same as sill. For roller blind, measure sill where it meets wall or trim
    6. trim: sometimes surrounds recess. It’s on wall where it meets sill. If trim has a gently curved surface, bend roller blind rails to fit it. But do not attach blind to convoluted trim.
    7. wall

Some casement windows leave no space for a blind or vent because they are flush with the wall and open inwardly. In this case, either 1. build a deep-set frame around window to attach blind to 2. sew a velcro blind into a box so it attaches to the wall but then sticks out enough to allow the window to open behind it 3. remove window and replace with a solid panel of wood of the same size with a slot cut in it for vent

roller blind

photo: roller blind, closed
photo: roller blind, panel and joint
photo: roller blind, frame and parts
photo: roller blind, rail section

  • the blind mounts on wall. The design can be adapted to mount on the ceiling or top-sill. If you need this, DIY or write me.
  • use key to decipher plans
  • measure window on all four sides. Windows are rarely identical or perfectly perpendicular
  • h (italicized): height of recess, measured between T and B sills. Measure both sides.
  • w (italicized): width of window recess, measured between the side sills. w changes slightly top to bottom. Measure top for cassette, bottom for rail B or footer, and 170mm up from bottom sill for joint. w of blind itself should be narrowest of 3 measurements.

plan: roller blind, layout
plan: roller blind, frame
plan: roller blind, panel
plan: roller blind, parts

  • materials
    • white IKEA Tupplur blackout blind, enough for double layers (don’t get black; the coating seems to be thinner and actually leaks more light)
    • black fleece (locking seals and chain seals may not be necessary. Try without them first.)
    • paper
      • acid-free
      • ~300gsm bond or coverstock
      • either black or any color with 100–120gsm black paper lining (lining not in design)
    • wood
      • braces: 35-50W x 6-12D (plans are for 37 x 7mm; adjust as necessary)
      • bar: w-10L x 30W x 6-10D
      • board: w+130L + 44H x 8-12D
    • cardboard, single layer, 4.2mm thick
    • caulk: cheap, semi-adhesive, and dark stuff that you can easily cut through and scrape off when removing blind without damaging it
  • cassette
    • choose left or right chain
    • the block pattern on parts page lays on a block of wood, 50 x 37 x 19
    • spacers are made of credit cards or similar ~1mm thick material. Make more or less as necessary
  • roller blind
    • to cut: roll it neatly, measure and mark where cut will be, wrap a piece of paper around so edge lines up with mark and tape in place, cut through layers of blind fabric with razor knife all the way around
    • chain: to get it through board
      • cut it and overlap and splice it back together with sewing thread (for blinds shorter than chain, where splice needn’t pass through chain anchor. Chains can also be lengthened with cord; just position chain in gear of chain bracket so blind stops rolling up and down before cord enters gear.)
      • or cut board from each hole to edge of board
      • use bottom chain anchor as usual.
    • mount on wall with caulking and blocks
  • frame
    • cut frame patterns in half horizontally through the zigzag arrow
    • stretch them apart to match window size as defined by w and h.
    • for frame pieces longer than paper
      1. butt pieces heavy paper together
      2. join with 20mm wide strip of 120gsm paper and glue
      3. then mark/crease/score/cut
    • gluing
      • when gluing footer or joint, glue paper to brace/bar first, then glue other folds
      • glue one set of folds at a time, 2-3 sets in each rail/joint/footer
      • use smallest amount of glue possible (test to see how much is sufficient)
      • immediately clamp pieces
      • when you glue final fold of rails, you must put something non-stickable between the layers, against 9mm spacers, to prevent 40mm wide areas from getting sticking together.
    • joint
      • SW=spacer wood. Dimensions when installed (H x W x D) w x bar D+1 x ~4
      • SC=spacer cardboard: one layer or maybe two layers joined with tiny dots of glue
      • SW+SC=10
      • black line between SW and bar is layer of black paper glued to SW
    • mount rails with caulk on corner of sill and wall/trim
  • panel
    • carefully transfer hole & slot marks from plan to fabric & braces
    • cut slot and attach vent to panel
    • glue braces L & R to back of panel
    • screw braces T & B to front of panel into holes of braces L & R with 5mm wood screws
    • drill 4mm middle holes through brace T and vent shell flaps
    • remove brace T
    • slip panel into rails. Shoehorn it in with 50mm wide paper strips
    • re-attach brace T, 4mm machine screws from front in middle holes with washers and nuts at the back
  • panel alternative for short, wide windows
    • put vent in a tall narrow panel at one side of window. Put a 60-80mm wide vertical frame member into the window recess 305mm from the side closest to your bed. Make a 365W x h+60mm wood panel. Cut vertical slot in it for vent. Install vent. Point side opening toward window opening. Screw panel to wall and frame piece with 20mm strip of black fleece as a gasket.

    Uncovered edge of vertical frame member holds rails for roller blind that covers remaining part of window. To keep blind in place when wind blows too strong, stick pushpins through rails and blind every 200-300mm. Always use same holes.

velcro

Note: the plan view in this drawing shows just the bottom right corner of the blind. The light grey is the window frame.
plan: velcro blind

I am still testing this design. At first, I cut the fabric from an IKEA Tupplar blackout blind and attached it to a window frame with adhesive velcro (hook&loop). This was the prototype. It took an hour and it almost worked!

Problems:

  • light leaks sideways through the hook and loop of 25mm-wide black velcro!
  • fabric is not perfectly lightproof in one layer
  • plastic coating on fabric (especially black)
    • scratches easily, creating light leaks
    • peels off easily with adhesive of velcro or tape
  • stress on ends of velcro cause it to lose adhesion, peeling off fabric or frame
  • sealing black fabric over multi-pane windows destroys their vacuum seal with oven-level temperatures
  • black fabric can overheat room

Thus, these (untested) improvements should make it work:

  1. materials
    1. fabric
      • white IKEA Tupplar blackout blind
      • two layers, coated sides facing each other
    2. velcro, either
      • 25mm wide with a thick seal of black polar fleece just inside the velcro
      • 50mm wide (I have not tested this; I just know 25mm is almost enough to stop all light)
      • designs for both widths, each in two positions, are included in plan
  2. extra tools:
    • wooden cooking spoon or other smooth, rounded piece of plastic or wood, at least 50mm long
    • board
      • 10-20mm thick, 10-40cm wide, 200–300cm long,
      • clean, smooth, straight, flat
  3. choose position
    1. window recess
      • attach blind here when:
        • attaching lightproof vent to blind and keeping window open
        • window frame is not big enough to hold velcro
        • light leaks around frame, sash, sill, or trim
      • cut first piece 55 wider and higher than recess for velcro-seal, 75mm wider for velcro-wide
    2. window frame
      • attach blind here when window
        • open but will never open during darkness
        • have a perfect light seal
        • have a frame at least 45mm wide
      • cut first piece of fabric 7mm narrower and shorter than exposed part of frame
      • cut second piece 40mm wider and 40mm higher than first piece
  4. assembly
    1. affix hook (scratchy) side of velcro to frame or wall all the way around the window
      • outside of velcro is 60mm from edge of glass or recess
      • extend vertical strips 10-30mm beyond horizontal strips
      • affix one side, then top and bottom, then other side, ends of horizontal pieces jammed against edges of vertical pieces
      • cut four, 10mm strips of loop (fuzzy) side of velcro and mate them to ends of vertical hook
    2. mate the loop to the hook, sides first, leaving the paper adhesive cover on
      • horizontal strips should overlap vertical strips
      • vertical strips should extend 90mm past horizontal strips and 30mm past edge of fabric
      • go around velcro and press it hard into wall to improve seal of hook to frame/wall
    3. join mylar to blackout fabric
      • cut mylar or white fabric for style 1 the size of the glass pane; for style 2, the size of the recess
      • glue mylar or white fabric on uncoated fabric side of blackout fabric with textile glue or spray adhesive, leaving 10mm gap between edge of mylar and where velcro will be
    4. join decorative fabric to blackout fabric
      • wrap decorative fabric 20mm around the edge of the blackout fabric
      • attach it to the back with textile or hot glue or by sewing
    5. join fabric to velcro
      • tape corners of fabric over the velcro so fabric extends 30mm past velcro
      • undo the masking tape at the bottom corners
      • get under fabric, lifting it away from velcro
      • remove paper adhesive cover from top horizontal velcro
      • carefully lower fabric onto it and press hard to make good seal between velcro and fabric
      • repeat with bottom horizontal velcro
      • remove paper from a side strip of velcro and seal fabric to it
      • fold ends of vertical velcro 40mm from end, 20mm from edge of fabric, sticking it back on itself and overlapping the fabric 20mm
      • staple the ends through the fabric twice
      • repeat on other side
    6. secure velcro adhesive: press smooth plastic tool strongly into velcro all the way around the blind to ensure total adhesion
    7. if using a black seal with 25mm velcro:
      1. grabbing a velcro tab at corner of blind, carefully remove it from wall
      2. study the section view of the seal in the plan. Make seal into a thick folded roll resembling the drawing, 10mm wide, 5mm thick, with 3mm flap. Hold roll together with a tiny amount of glue. Put it under board while it dries.
      3. to attach seal to wall, attach seal flap to hook of velcro or glue thick black fabric strip just inside the velcro all the way around. It must be twice as thick as both sides of velcro combined
      4. put fabric back on wall
    8. Voila!
plastic
  1. materials (test whatever you use for absolute lightproofness)
    • 1 layer: pond lining made of extra-thick black polyethylene or EPDM rubber
    • use probably in 2-3 layers
      • construction sheeting, black polyethylene, .2mm thick, found at building supply houses in rolls or off a roll by the meter
      • “light deprivation” tarp used in greenhouses, one side white, the other black or white
      • farmer’s plastic/agricultural plastic, one side white, the other black or white
      • Stick-On plastic sheeting from easyblindsonline.co.uk
    • several layers: colored garbage bags
  2. assembly
    1. Important: first cover windows with white paper or fabric. This avoids attracting attention. And it reflects heat back out of window. Window can be damaged or even explode if simply sealed with black plastic!
    2. measure and cut plastic to extend 100mm beyond window recess and any trim in case light and air leak between the window and wall. Or, if all joints and seals are perfect, and the window will not open during rest, cut plastic to almost cover frame.
    3. tape plastic to wall (or frame). Use 25mm black masking tape: Intertape PF3 or PB1, Shurtape T106. It is effective, cheap, sticks and conforms well to irregular wall surfaces, yet comes off easily without residue (unless you leave it up a long time). Not perfectly lightproof, it works with the plastic. Local art and professional lighting supply stores carry it. . If it is not sticky enough on your surfaces, use photographic masking tape or black kraft paper tape. These are thicker (more lightproof), stronger, stickier, and more expensive. Look for ProGaff (formerly Permacel) 743, Shurtape 724 or 743, and 3M 235.
    4. avoid electrical tape and most duct and gaffer’s tape. They are made of soft vinyl and especially obnoxious adhesives and are thus extremely toxic in their manufacture, handling, use, and disposal. One exception I know is Shurtape PC 657, a polyethylene coated gaffer’s tape. Do research; the devil is in the details.
    5. if the room gets too hot from direct sun, then before taping up the black plastic, cut a piece of cardboard the same size as the recess. Tape or glue aluminum foil to one side of it. Leave 15mm spaces between the strips of foil to allow moisture to pass through. Set the cardboard in recess, foil facing outward. In really hot areas, put foil on the outside or get exterior blinds or awnings.
    6. if it is a cold room, do exactly the same thing as for a hot room, but with the foil facing inward. If the room gets hot and cold with the seasons, open up the plastic on one edge and switch the cardboard around every six months.
foil

This only works on non-opening windows, where you don’t need a vent. It helps if no light leaks through any joints of windows, but this can be sealed with tape or mitigated with dark curtain.

While aluminum foil is the thinnest, cheapest, most widely available lightproof material, it is not great for lightproofing. It only works one time. When it bends, it cracks and creates light leaks you can’t see till the middle of a retreat. Bummer. But it works in a pinch if you are careful.

The trick is to unroll foil directly onto the glass and cut it in place. This prevents bending and cracking. Do not attempt to unroll foil away from window, like tearing it from the box, then apply it.

Also, apply foil directly to the glass. If you tape it to the frame, suspended in midair away from the window, it will rattle as air pressure changes near the window. Annoying.

  1. materials:
    • aluminum foil, heavy duty if possible (the wide stuff for grilling)
    • electrical tape (19mm black vinyl), gaffer’s tape, black masking tape
    • scissors
    • pizza cutter
  2. assemble
    1. with scissors, cut several 2cm pieces of tape and hang them within reach of the window (keep scissors handy)
    2. starting 1cm from top left of window pane, unroll foil downward 10cm. Lightly tape foil at top with small piece of tape.
    3. unroll foil to bottom and cut 3cm longer than the pane with sharp scissors
    4. unstick tape at top and reposition foil so edges extend 1cm past pane
    5. tape right side of foil to glass with 2cm pieces of tape every 40-50cm
    6. press foil into corners of pane, folding edges onto frame
    7. tape top, bottom, and left sides of foil in place with 2cm pieces of tape
    8. repeat steps 2–7 but on right side of pane, then in the middle of pane
    9. tape full length of foil seams, where sheets overlap. As you pull out a length of tape, it will stretch. Let it relax before applying it.
    10. tape foil to frame
    11. tack dark blankets over window to catch any leaks

bathroom & kitchen

If you have a bathroom and kitchen you can easily darken or use with a blindfold, great.

For short retreats in a building without plumbing, make the quick, cheap, portable fixtures below. If basic versions are too punk rock for you, try the upgrades. You can incrementally improve them as you find out the value of retreating for yourself.

sink

basic
  • table
  • rectangular plastic basin, like a restaurant bus tub
  • 30cm-tall stand for bottle behind basin
  • 10 or 20L bottle with valve-cap on stand
  • drinking water (if separate from wash water): in 20L bottle with valve-cap
  • waste (water and food): two, 20L buckets with lids
upgrade
  • salvaged sink set in a counter-height table
  • drains directly into waste bucket
  • upgrade again by adding a drain tube to outside.

composting toilet

basic

It’s a 20L bucket with a toilet seat on top. No kidding!

  • put 2 liters of sawdust in the bottom
  • put 15 liters more sawdust in another bucket by the toilet
  • with a scoop, put a 0.5L of sawdust in toilet after each use
  • place toilet away from bed and close to return vent
  • dispose in a covered compost pile that will sit for a year before use
upgrade

A 20L bucket sits inside an enclosure with a hole in the top. The return duct attaches to a hole in the side of the enclosure. So all air exits the room through the toilet, containing all odor. Bucket also collects pee, so empty it every 3-5 days. Making a vented urinal or a toilet that separates pee from poop is possible, too.

Dimensions: 35cmH x 60W x 60D

plan: toilet top
plan: toilet frame
plan: toilet liner

  • top
    • platform made of 15–20mm tongue and groove boards or 12–19mm plywood
    • front and back boards, ~25mm x 37mm, go under platform to fit on top of front and back frame pieces and between frame legs
    • hole is at least 20mm smaller than bucket opening all the way around
    • attach toilet seat to top
    • reinforcer only for tongue and groove boards, directly behind toilet seat mounts
  • frame
    • made of 25mm x 37 lumber
    • joint is extra strong, non-planar joint (see gridbeam.com)
    • black dots indicate heads of screws. Always drill pilot holes for screws.
    • adjust leg height to allow a 15mm space between top of bucket and underside of toilet top
  • liner
    • made of thick plastic sheeting
    • folds into an open box
    • resulting triangular gussets in corners A fold against outside of liner
    • liner fits inside frame
    • top edges fold over horizontal frame pieces and get thumbtacked in place on outside
    • toilet bucket goes inside air and waterproof plastic liner
    • cut hole B for return duct
      • 30mm smaller than return duct to stretch and fit over it snugly
      • so duct is 50–100mm off floor and next to a frame leg (attach a bracket to support duct if necessary)
      • fold nearest gusset away from hole
      • hole B in plan is just an example: 70mm diameter hole for 100mm diameter duct

bathing

basic

A washcloth or sponge for a sponge bath

upgrade
  • on waterproof floor (or covered with large plastic sheet) make a 2m diameter border of towels or bedsheet and sit in the middle
  • put shower water in two 1.5L soda bottles with loose lids or nearly closed drinking spout lids
  • hold a bottle above yourself with one hand and wash yourself with the other
deluxe upgrade

plan: shower

It’s a simple shower which collapses for storage and requires no plumbing pipes. It uses (from top down):

  • hook (in ceiling, 50mm)
  • bucket (4L, hangs from hook by handle)
  • siphon tube (polyethylene, 4mm ID x 50cm, bent near its middle with heat to hook over rim of bucket)
  • 4 cords (hung from hook, tied to curtain rod)
  • curtain rod (circular, 120cm diameter, made of 30mm OD, black poly pipe, dowel inside ends for smooth joint)
  • curtain (polyester, with 15cm sleeve for rod (as shown) or grommets and rings, 5cm bottom hem with small river rocks inside to weigh it down)
  • x=holes in curtain for cords to tie around curtain rod
  • large tub (90L+, from garden supply store, catches everything at the bottom). Could also be a large, deep tray or pan

Solar water heating method: use two, clear, 2L bottles with rectangles of black plastic sheeting inside to act as elements. Have supporter give them to you when hot. Or, with dark clothing and sleeping mask on tight, grab them from sunny spot.

Mix hot water in bucket with cold water to suit yourself. When ready to bathe, suck on the tube to start the siphon action. Water flows for eight minutes. Not bad. Dump used water into a 20L bucket with a lid for later disposal.

Adjust shower length and water flow with different size buckets. Make sure hook can hold the weight.

~~

I assume you will find simpler, more adaptable ways to make darkrooms in a variety of settings. Please share your methods.

~~

More metric near-equivalents:

  • 30cm = 1’ (foot)
  • 3m = 10’
  • 1m2 = 11’2
  • 4’ x 8’ sheet = 120cm x 240cm (~3m2)
  • 1kg = 2.2 lbs
  • 28g = 1 oz

7 - faq

mechanics

  • Where can I go to retreat?

Don’t go anywhere yet. First make darkness happen in your own home for sleeping, then for short retreats (up to 8 days). Once you’ve learned the ropes, use a public darkroom for medium retreats (up to a month). Only a handful of these exist worldwide. You may need to arrange it yourself. A private cabin is needed for a long retreat (up to a year).

  • Do you eat in a retreat?

    Yes. Food is always available. Fresh fruit and tender leafy green vegetable only, in accordance with the frugivorous nature of human anatomy and physiology.

  • How many people retreat at once?

    One. The point of this retreat is to rest, heal, and recover oneself. There is nothing more stimulating and distracting than other people.

  • How do you do things in darkness?

    Very slowly. And after becoming familiar with the room and making memorable places for your belongings before turning out the lights.

  • Couldn’t you just retreat with a sleeping mask?

    No. The skin has enough light receptors to awaken you from sleep. Masks do not stay in place, so they leak light. They are not comfortable for extended use. And you still need a properly ventilated room, minimally furnished to eliminate dangers, distractions, and associations.

    Sleeping masks are good for travel, naps, and sleeping until your bedroom can be darkened. Also, for walking through a semi-lit space between a darkroom and a bathroom in dwellings where this is necessary.

  • Is it like meditation?

    On the surface, the two processes have some similarities. Each involves less physical activity. Attention gravitates from the world to oneself.

    But what goes on inside oneself radically differs. Meditation is active, ie, the will drives the process. It’s purpose is to make the unconscious conscious. It is a quiet internal war. Darkroom retreating is passive, ie, the unconscious drives it, with the will secondary, as a servant. It’s purpose is to rest so the being can restore itself to wholeness. It is peacemaking. These subtly different drivers and purposes have massive effects on one’s experience and results.

concerns

  • Wouldn’t you go crazy staying in darkness that long?

    No. You would only go crazy in darkness from being forced to be there, as in prison. A retreat is a choice based on reason, and the door is always unlocked.

  • Do you get bored?

    Yes. It is a very good sign. Sometimes your autonomic self works on something so damaged, painful, and draining that the psyche has had to completely shut off feeling to it. It becomes an internal black hole. Boredom means you are approaching it and that recovery of a lost part of yourself is imminent.

  • Four days is a long time to sit around doing nothing.

    Something tells me you’ve never tried it out of prejudice. I mean that civilization has taught us all that will is the only useful driver of activity in the being. This is absurd. Without autonomic activity, we would suffocate in our own internal waste in seconds. Still, we are told if we are not busy, then we are bad. Only doing things by wilful effort is respectable. Nevermind that, when it comes to restoring psychic integrity (every animal’s greatest value), the will is helpless and the autonomic self is infinitely intelligent, capable, and graceful.

    If you mean it sounds pointless or dreadful, in fact a retreat usually begins with a sense of relief. Discomfort may come. But then you make contact with your autonomic self again, and this is extremely meaningful and enjoyable. Generally, people find that four days of sinking deeply into themselves is way too short. It sounds like you would be surprised to discover how interesting you are.

objections

  • I could never do a darkroom retreat.

    At the moment, your doing a retreat is out of the question. You cannot do it if you don’t want to, and you cannot want to if you don’t know about it enough to believe in it. So forget about doing it. The only thing that matters is, does it interest you enough to learn more about it? If so, then I happen to know a good book on the subject.

  • Isn’t total darkness unnatural? Shouldn’t we be exposed to stars and moon at night?

    No. Covering our eyes, seeking solitude, and taking cover when traumatized—shocked, exhausted, or emotionally overwhelmed—is a reflex. We have to be conditioned out of it by force. Taking extended shelter like a darkroom retreat merely supports this reflex when the trauma is great enough to require it.

    Our obsession with building—the principle activity of civilization for 10,000 years—indicates mass, major psychic trauma in search of self-healing. When we get especially frustrated, we even have wars to destroy buildings and build new ones.

    Shelter is an instinct that intensifies with trauma. Large uncovered windows came only very recently to popular architecture. Traditional shelter, civilized and indigenous, is dark or easily darkenable.

    Our natural habitat is tropical forest. The forest floor is perfectly dark at night due to the density of the canopy. Even when sleeping in the open, the amount of light from stars and moon is surprisingly little compared to artificial light.

  • Darkness could be good for some people, but there are many ways people can heal their pain. Nothing works for everyone.

    This would mean that:

    • deep healing can occur without deep sleep
    • light does not interfere with deep sleep
    • the human organism has no specific needs for healing from psychic trauma, despite its specific—and universal—need of rest for healing in all other cases. As well as its specific needs of air for breathing, light for seeing, food for eating, etc.

    Naturally, I disagree. Relativism makes fashionable philosophy but poor physiology.

appendix—laws of life

  1. Life’s Great Law: Every living cell of the organized body is endowed with an instinct of self-preservation, sustained by an inherent force in the organism called “vital force” or “life force.” The success of each living organism whether it be simple or complex is directly proportional to the amount of its life force and inversely proportional to the degree of its activity.
  2. The Law of Order: The living organism is completely self-constructing, self-maintaining, self-directing, self-repairing, self-defending, and self-healing.
  3. The Law of Action: Whenever action occurs in the living organism, as the result of extraneous influences, the action must be ascribed to the living thing, which has the power of action, and not to any lifeless thing, whose leading characteristic is inertia.
  4. The Law of Power: The power employed, and consequently expended, in any vital or medicinal action is vital power, that is, power from within and not from without.
  5. The Law of Distribution: Distribution of the body’s power is proportionate to the importance and needs of the various organs and tissues of the body.
  6. The Law of Conservation: Whenever nutritive abstinence is affected, the living organism’s reserves are conserved and economized: living structures are autolyzed in the inverse order of their usefulness, while toxic substances are being eliminated. This Law refers to fasting; it applies to starvation as well. Also called The Law of Autolysis.
  7. The Law of Limitation: Whenever and wherever the expenditure of vital power has advanced so far that a fatal exhaustion is imminent, a check is put upon the unnecessary expenditure of power; and the organism rebels against the further use of even an accustomed stimulant.
  8. The Law of Special Economy: An organism under favorable conditions stores excess vital energy, materials above the current expenditures as a “reserve fund” to be employed in time of special need.
  9. The Law of Vital Accommodation: The response of the vital organism to external stimuli is an instinctive one, based upon a self-preservative instinct which adapts or accommodates itself to whatever influence it cannot destroy or control.
  10. The Law of Dual Effect: The secondary effect upon a living organism of any act, habit, indulgence, or agent is the exact opposite and equal of the primary effect.
  11. The Law of Compensation “The Law of Repose”: Whenever action in the body has expended the substance and available energy of the body, rest is induced in order to replenish the body’s substance and energy. Also called The Law of Repose.
  12. The Law of Selective Elimination: All injurious substances which, by any means, gain admittance into a living organism are counteracted, neutralized, and eliminated as fully as bodily nerve energy supply allows and by such means and through such channels as will produce the least amount of harm to living structure.
  13. The Law of Utilization: The normal elements and materials of life are all that the living organism is ever capable of constructively utilizing, whether it is well or sick. No substance or process that is not a normal-factor-element in physiology can be of any value in the structure of the living organism; and that which is unusable in a state of health, is equally unusable in a state of illness.
  14. The Law of Quality Selection: When the quality of nutriment being received by the living organism is higher than that of the present living tissue, the organism will discard lower-grade cells to make room for appropriating the superior materials into new and healthy tissue.
  15. The Law of the Minimum: The development of living organisms is regulated by the supply of that element or factor which is least abundantly provided or utilized. The element or factor in shortest supply determines the amount of development.
  16. The Law of Development: The development of all or any parts of the living organism is measured in direct proportion to the amount of vital forces and nutritive materials which are directed to it and brought to bear upon it.

Resume reading hygiene

appendix—pathology

Pathology is the study of disease, including its nature, causes, and symptoms. Pathology guides our conscious response to disease. Every school of health has a general theory of pathology. In fact, many systems are named for their pathologies because they are basically oriented toward disease: homeopathy, naturopathy, osteopathy, allopathy (medicine). Allopathy’s germ theory of disease leads doctors to gloss over causes and get right to symptomology and treatment. By contrast, a benevolent view of disease keeps a hygienist cool as a cucumber. Hygiene makes plenty of time to correct allopathy’s imbalance with careful etiology (study of causes). This reveals the simplest and most effective responses.

In the 1930s, hygienist Dr. John Tilden, identified seven stages of all chronic disease. This provides hygiene with a general theory of pathology. Each stage describes what happens as our energy level gets lower and lower. Note that a sick person can move down the steps (become sicker), or up (become well). It is simple cause and effect. Hygiene proves in theory and repeatedly demonstrates in practice the reversibility of the trend.

The following summary of Tilden’s analysis of disease comes from The Health Seekers Yearbook by Victoria Bidwell.

seven stages of disease

  1. Enervation: Nerve Energy is so reduced or exhausted that all normal bodily functions are greatly impaired, especially the elimination of endogenous and exogenous poisons. Stage One thus begins the progressive and chronic process of “Toxemia Toleration” that continues through all of the following stages. The Toxic Sufferer does not feel his “normal self.” He feels either stimulated or depressed by the poisonous overload.
  2. Toxemia: Nerve Energy is too low to eliminate metabolic wastes and ingested poisons. These toxic substances begin to saturate first the bloodstream and lymphatic fluids and then the cells themselves. The Toxic Sufferer feels inordinately tired, run-down, and “out of it.”
  3. Irritation: Toxic build-up within the blood and lymph and tissues continues. The cells/tissues where build-up occurs are irritated by the toxic nature of the waste, resulting in a low-grade inflammation. The Toxic Sufferer can feel exhausted, queasy, irritable, itchy, even irrational and hostile. During these first 3 stages, if The Toxic Sufferer does consult a medical doctor about the reason for his low energy and irritability, the doctor tells him: “There is nothing wrong with you. These symptoms are ‘all in your head.’ You are perfectly healthy!”
  4. Inflammation: The low-grade, chronic inflammation from Stage Three is leading to the death of cells. An area or organ where toxicants have amassed next becomes fully inflamed. The Toxic Sufferer experiences actual pain, along with pathological symptoms at this point. With the appearance of these symptoms, the medical doctor can finally give The Sufferer’s complaint a name. Traditionally, medical scientists have named many of the 20,000 distinctly different diseases after the site where the toxins have accumulated and precipitated their symptoms. Once the set of symptoms is conveniently named, the doctor can mechanically prescribe the “antidote” from his Physician’s Desk Reference or from his memorized medical/ pharmaceutical repertoire. Standard medical doctors thus commence drugging and treating at this stage.
  5. Ulceration: Tissues are destroyed. The body ulcerates, forming an outlet for the poisonous build-up. The Toxic Sufferer experiences a multiplication and worsening of symptoms while the pain intensifies. Standard medical doctors typically continue drugging and often commence with surgery and other forms of more radical and questionable treatment at this stage.
  6. Induration: Induration is the result of long-standing, chronic inflammation with bouts of acute inflammation interspersed. The chronic inflammation causes an impairment or sluggishness of circulation: and because some cells succumb, they are replaced with scar tissue. This is the way we lose good, normal-functioning cells — by chronic inflammation and death of cells. Toxins may or may not be encapsulated in a tumor, sac, wen, or polyp. The Toxic Sufferer endures even more physical pain, which is intensified by the emotional distress of realizing that he is only getting worse, regardless of his earnest, obedient, even heroic attempts to get well. Standard medical doctors continue with both drugging and surgery and all other kinds of modalities deemed appropriate, both conventional and experimental. (“Induration” means “hardening” or “scarring” of tissues.)
  7. Fungation (cancer): Cellular integrity is destroyed through their disorganization and/or cancerous proliferation. Tissues, organs, and whole systems lose their ability to function normally. Biochemical and morphological changes from the depositing of Endogenous and Exogenous Toxins bring about degenerations and death at the cellular level. The Toxic Sufferer is “a pathological mess”: he is on his deathbed. Standard medical doctors declare at this stage: “There is no hope left. You have just so much longer to live. You need to make preparations accordingly.” Failure of vital organs eventually results in death.

comments

Tilden’s analysis shows the close relationship between enervation and toxemia as the two most obvious causes of all illness. It explains hygiene’s success in supporting the recovery of countless people whose cases allopathy pronounced hopeless.

But a flaw remained in hygiene’s pathology, undermining its status and success. It did not acknowledge the importance of trauma and could not deal with it. Hygiene thus surrendered the allopathic surgery its helplessness with trauma and the resulting dependency on allopathy’s reckless embrace of. After all, how could enervation and toxemia begin in healthy mammals with strong, acute instincts? Only the overwhelming disaster of mass major trauma could do it. But this Cause Zero remained invisible to hygiene. This was due to trauma’s dissociating, amnesiac effect; its distance in time from later chronic disease; the unconscious denial it induced; the deep pain and fear of approaching it; and the intense moralism of many hygienists, rooted in their great and rebellious efforts to be responsible for their health.

Also, most hygienic physicians start as allopaths. Their fascination with and awe of surgery seems very hard to shake. It makes people seem powerful on nature’s scale. It affirms the civilized fear of nature and the body. It reinforces the unconscious feeling of infantile helplessness following trauma.

In short, we seem caught in a strange dream, half-waking and prolonged. But rather than force ourselves awake with discipline, hygienic darkroom retreating allows us to fully sleep it out. Hygiene has always been a kind of physiological judo: calm, understanding, effective. Wait for trauma to replay its disastrous drama in our lives, we can take hygiene’s peaceful, reassured approach to resolving it once and for all.

bibliography and influences

  • indigeny vs industry
  • philosophical and spiritual traditions
    • my parents, John and LouAnn
    • Atlas Shrugged, etc, Ayn Rand, preceptor
    • Tantric Hinduism with guru, Purna Steinitz
    • In Search of the Miraculous, Ouspensky (Gurdjieff’s basic teachings)
    • radical orthodox Christianity with DeWaynn Rogers (late legal counsel, enigma, and possibly Teacher of the Age)
    • animism from nature, books (above), elders (scoutmaster Jack Asher; godfather and mentor, John Boyer), extended family, and friends
  • health
  • design and art
    • my parents and brother, Paul
    • grandmaster craftsman and engineer, Jack Nuckols
    • childhood teacher, Steve Parks (Horizons School, Twin Falls)
    • accompanist and mentor, Willetta Warberg
    • The Dark is Rising, Susan Cooper
    • The Natural House, Frank Lloyd Wright
    • Selected Poems, Robert Bly
    • BuckyWorks, Jay Baldwin (about Buckminster Fuller)
  • experiences
    • one week of humane society at Sawtooth Methodist Church Camp, Idaho, Joanie Williamson, director, 1985
    • three months enraptured, Idaho, 1987
    • 23 days fasting in California desert, 1991
    • one week at Rainbow National Gathering, Idaho, 2001
    • 60-hour darkroom retreat supported by elder, Finn Po, Oregon, 2006
    • 10 days in audience of Advaita grandmaster, Arnaud Desjardins, Montana, 2007
    • eight seconds in dreamtime with elder, Adrian Wolfe, Oregon, 2008
    • 18 months with the Maya at Lake Atitlan, Guatemala, 2011
    • two months of life-altering sex, Sweden, 2012

acknowledgments

Thanks to:

First and foremost, my editors, for heroic efforts to make this book real. In triage, you were as merciful as you could be:

  • Are Solheim, writer and fellow refugee in darkness, for seeing and believing in me and the book, visionary editing, hosting me during the rewrite, and for your sly love for humanity, even me
  • Magnus Vanebo, philosopher, for enthusiastically diving into the text and sensitively editing it

    Also,

  • Bertrand Besigye, outlandish poet and fellow journeyman in darkness, for early support of the book

Hundreds of others in eight countries on two continents over 28 years, who morally and materially aided me during my prodigal search. To name but a few:

Family, immediate and extended: I leaned on all of you that would let me. It can’t be easy rearing a stubborn 20, 30, then 40 year-old psychotic infant in a world that denies everything real. Thanks, especially, to

  • Brother Paul, for shelter you should never have had to give
  • Grandmother Anna Lou Craig Callen Posey, always there
  • Brother Francois, for the constant experience of love
  • Cousin Christopher, for your generosity and grit
  • Uncle Jim—dropout, drug dealer, beach bum, loser, cool-ass motherfucker—for laughingly giving the system the finger till the day you died. RIP.

Trimurti: my second family, torn away as soon as I noticed, for helping raise me

Everyone named as an influence: for friendship, support, and raising the bar so high that anti-gravity boots became necessary. And especially elders:

  • Jack Nuckols: a giant of a man and first among my elders. RIP.
  • Willetta Warberg: who poured her heart and soul into me
  • John Boyer: who fed me with so much of his time
  • Purna Steinitz: who kept his terrible promise
  • DeWaynn Rogers: who helped me up and kept me from the system’s clutches. RIP.
  • Finn Po: elder, master job trainer, pioneer of the way of the future

Each of you gave me the world.

Old friends:

  • John Roberts: lifelong best friend, supporter, host
  • Daniel Meulbroek: guardian, supporter, and host extraordinaire
  • Brian Riggs Sullivan: full-throttle collaborator
  • Evelyn Thomas and Alton Sterling Voss: supporters and fellow survivors
  • Ian Robertson, for the lifering of rationality when it mattered most

Since darkness fell:

  • America
    • Rob Miller, Malia Shultheis, and Jen Carroll: supporters and early retreat hosts
    • Jesse King, John Monroe, and Elisabeth Goward, Dome Villagers at Maitreya Ecovillage, Eugene: serious camaraderie and support
    • Hannah Christina Torres for the original window covering idea
    • Brian Riggs Sullivan: for first help in developing these ideas and, as always, trying them out yourself
    • Daniel Tucker and Les, Ben Ramsey and Stephanie: for KCMO shelter
  • Guatemala
    • The Maya: for your friendship and unshakable presence
    • Chrissy Weisgard: friend, host, supporter, and, like Sandro, a fellow dyed-in-the-wool darkness spelunker
    • *Niels Gronau: for the miraculous Guatemalan facility
    • Elena Rago: friend and provider of an experimental facility
    • Karsten : friend, supporter, client, and for lending me tools and workshop where such things are rare
    • Tom Savage: friend and supporter
    • *Sandro Garcia, Nancy Gayle Martin, and Violet: heroic friends, hosts, supporters, retreatants
    • *Joshua Brang: friend, supporter, travel agent
    • All my clients in Guatemala: for exploring darkness with me
  • Europe
    • Kostas: fast friend, host, and shepherd from Greece to Northern Europe
    • David and
    • Oscar, Limme, and Max at Kulturforeningen Gryning of Helsingborg: friends and supporters. Cheers!
    • Anna Ericksson: supporter and darkness experimenter
    • *Sanna Aatig: friend, supporter, host, and nurse in my darkest days
    • Frank Cicela: angel supporter since 2002!
    • Brad Crutchfield: friend, always-interested supporter, and deep well-wisher
    • Åsa Ringstrom and Johan Lörne: friends and supporters
    • *Johan Järlind: work partner, investor, retreat host, supporter, confidant, and friend in a critical year. You gave me so much, I’m speechless except… thank you.
    • Richard Nöjd for hardwon darkroom design ideas
    • A woman, unnamed, who initiated me in an essential part of my lost self, leading to the conclusive test of this idea
    • Marcus Ivarsson and Emma Sofie Berg: connectors
    • Stisse and Carina Gilgren: Swedish godparents
    • The people and place of Skattungbyn, Sweden
    • Dr Anette Kjellgren: for unqualified, professional encouragement
    • *Bård Anders Lien, friend, host, sponsor, apprentice and guide in Oslo
    • Terje Tjensvoll, supporter, host, collaborator, and guardian
    • Elisabette Molin: friend, supporter, and champion retreat host
    • Simen Kirkerød, Astrit Gashi: friends, hosts, collaborators
    • *Ketil Berg, friend, host, sponsor, treasurer extraordinaire. Without you, 2015 would have been very hard to survive.
    • Marie Richert and Virginie Bournaud, friends, hosts, sponsors, and guides in Paris

I called some people here guides, but anyone who hosted me also guided me. I’ve needed a lot of help for a long time. Everyone on this list put a lot of time and energy into me and my work. There was never any messing around.

Ok, maybe a little.

I also made enemies and hurt some people along the way. I’m sorry it didn’t go the way we thought at first. Here’s hoping it was not in vain.

Acknowledgments in books usually bore me. This one I cannot read without weeping again. Onward, then, till the task is complete.

services

I do everything related to hygienic darkroom retreating: study, experiment, write, speak, consult, design, build.

writing

  • Get my ebook from leanpub
  • Quote and excerpt anything in my book and website. Credit me and tell me where it will show up and I will also acknowledge and link to you on my website.
  • Invite me to write for your publication on any subject related to hygienic darkroom retreating and hygienic psychology.
  • Publish me, make money. See license

(Free or as you please)

speaking

Invite me to edify your audience.

(My minimalist expenses + something that fits your budget.)

consulting

Get my advice on darkroom retreating, building darkrooms, and issues arising thereof.

(€15/hr. First couple emails are free if you have read my book.)

I will respond in detail, by email or skype, to all your questions and concerns about:

  • how, where, and why to set up a darkroom
  • how to organize a retreat with or without a supporter
  • how to deal with specific issues you have about retreating itself

My responses will be based on my experience. Over the past ten years, I have:

  • done 20 retreats from 2-6 days long
  • facilitated 25 retreats for others
  • designed and built 15 working darkrooms, operating three of them
  • written 100,000 words about darkroom retreating for web, email, and print
  • given 14 public talks

design and build

Have me design and build your darkroom in an existing building or from scratch.

(€15/hr + materials, travel, & shelter)

license

Welcome to the political-economy of cool, where you get rewarded for cooperating, not threatened with punishment, if you don’t.

  1. Copyleft 2009-2015 by Andrew Durham. Copying is an act of . Please copy, distribute, and sell (yes, sell) my writings and industrial applications of them, ie, darkroom components, in any media or business venture for your own personal gain.
  2. I will recognize and link to you on this site if you:
    • credit me in quotation or excerpt and tell me where it is appearing
    • share improvements by sending pull requests or email
    • include this license in your whole or partial reprints of this book and with instructions accompanying componentry
    • include a printed or electronic copy of this book with componentry
  3. Furthermore, I will also give you my endorsement, a visible mark to use in your marketing copy if you:
    • share with me part of your earnings from:
      • reprints of my writings (8% of retail price for print and 70-90% for ebooks)
      • reproductions of darkroom components (1% of retail price)
    • and/or somehow astound me

    See home page/help out/ for how to send me money.

    Basically, this means you can instantly become my publisher or manufacturer! These deals roughly equal what you and I would make if I were published or self-published and you were simply selling the books, without your having to order from me in bulk, pay shipping, keep legally complicated records, or sign a contract.

    The idea is to make the book and componentry available with minimal friction in every way, at every level of distribution.

bio

Born 1971, Twin Falls, Idaho. For 21 years, I traveled America while searching for the cause of joy. I independently studied philosophy, health, and design, testing my findings by living outside, doing odd jobs, playing music, and building alternative shelter.

In 2008, my quest culminated in the darkness conjecture, a concept of the restful use of darkness in support of the self​-healing psyche. I spent the years since proving the concept; designing and building darkrooms and supporting retreats in Guatemala, Sweden, Norway, and Spain; giving lectures and consulting for readers; and documenting my work at andrewdurham.com.

contact

website: andrewdurham.com (for now, darkroomretreat.com redirects here)
email: info@andrewdurham.com
voicemail: 541.210.8470 (in US)
Please read services beforehand

Notes

1TC Fry, The Life Science Health System, a paraphrase of original quote by Herbert Shelton in Natural Hygiene: Man’s Pristine Way of Life

2Herbert Shelton, The Science and Fine Art of Natural Hygiene, back cover

3Ibid, p 35

4Ibid, p 139

5“Consciousness—for those living organisms which possess it—is the basic means of survival,” as philosopher, Ayn Rand, put it in her meta-ethics. See “The Objectivist Ethics” in The Virtue of Selfishness, p18.

6See Joseph Chilton Pearce, Evolution’s End

7This provides the unconscious motivation for the current over-fascination with genetics, a negligible subject shot through with distrust of life and mechanistic control-freakishness.

8This echoes one of Gurdjieff’s main points that a proper psychology and method of living will enable people to deal with life’s inevitable shocks. See Ouspensky’s In Search of the Miraculous

9As psychologists Michael Meade and James Hillman put it in the title of their 1993 book, We’ve Had a Hundred Years of Psychotherapy—And the World’s Getting Worse

10Hygienist, Bernarr Zovluck, quoted online