The Charismatic Coder
The Charismatic Coder
The Software Developer's Guide to Social Confidence and Emotional Freedom
About the Book
Find out the essence of my methods to unlock your most charismatic self
Throughout the last years on DevCareerMastery.com, articles, emails, and a book emerged on how to create a fulfilling career for yourself by developing your emotional intelligence and working on your self-esteem.
Many software developers possess above average intelligence and skills, yet, they cannot move forward in their career.
Some developers over-analyze things, and hardly ever give themselves permission to be their authentic, naturally charismatic selves.
In this book, you will read about a pattern describing an attitude that works without having to comply to stereotypes, or having to learn useless (and often horribly stupid) phrases for your interviews.
Do introverts REALLY finish last?
People tend to generalize too much. If something didn't work out once, they often think, there is a problem with them. They are not enough. They are broken. They need to meet some expectations of others to be accepted.
This forced compliance towards some false expectations acts as a self-fulfilling prophecy, sabotaging progress.
Unfortunately, knowledge is not enough. Even if some developers know that they have false expectations, they may easily get confused on how to put theory into practice.
Believe me, chances are, I am a bigger introvert than you are. This only means that I recharge my batteries alone when I get tired. Being social, networking, and enjoying yourself in the presence of other people is still possible.
It may take years to get rid of false expectations
In this book, you can read my personal experience on becoming more self-aware, more present, and as a side-effect, becoming more charismatic. Going through these experiences help you become more balanced and free.
I am not saying this is the blueprint of becoming charismatic, because information overload would not solve anything anyway. You can access the most important fundamentals overlooked by most people. These people choose a path leading towards an unfulfilling and anxious life, no matter how much effort they put in.
"True self-confidence is a side-effect of high self-esteem. You build your self-esteem by living according to your values. Choose your battles, start small, and continuously expand."
Table of Contents
-
Introduction
- My Story
- Your Journey
- What you can expect from this book
-
1 Discovering Your Charismatic Character
- Defining Charisma
- Focus
- The Roles We Play
- The Victim Role
- What Are Your Character Strengths?
- Values and Charisma
- Discovering Your Own Values
-
2 The Courage to Live Your Values
- The Cost of Living Your Values
- Hacking True Self-Confidence in Your Career
- Confidence, Ego, and Narcissism
- The Courage to be Vulnerable
- Integrity
- Exercising Your Boundaries
- Reading List
-
3 Escaping the Charisma Paradox
- Defining the Charisma Paradox
- The Science of Flow
- Social flow
- The importance of enjoying the process
- The Importance of Character Traits
-
4 Habits - The Cornerstones of a Charismatic Life
- Your Habits
- How will I make time for all this?
- Sports and nutrition
- Meditation
- Arts, dancing, vocal coaching
- Acting and Stream of Consciousness
- Therapy
- Fashion and Grooming
-
5 Reaching Emotional Freedom
- The reward of getting rid of limitations
- Understanding Limiting Beliefs
- The ABCDE method
- Self-awareness and Transformation
- Exercise: calm your inner critic
- Conditions for emotional change
- Limiting beliefs and your communication
- Inner and Outer Approaches
- Integrating all the tools
-
6 Total Social Freedom
- Training versus Trusting Mindset
- The source of social anxiety
- Interviewing skills
- Asking for a raise
- Presentation skills
- Time management and estimations
- Small talk, rapport, first impression
- Humor
- Speaking from the heart
- Leadership
- Setting Boundaries to Shield Yourself from Limiting Beliefs
- Summary
-
7 The Science of Storytelling
- The Benefits of Storytelling
- Emotions and logic
- Calibrated Storytelling
- Defining a story
- Story Structure
- Storytelling in Job Interviews
- Summary
- Notes
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